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t of her order； but she had changed her customary linen coif for filmier stuff that surrounded her face like a madonna's veil。 The thick mass of her hair was not braided tonight； but coiled beneath the veiling in a heavy； shining mass at the back of her head； apparently held only by a pair of silver pins。
〃What about us； my lord？〃 she replied。 〃I thought we had agreed we would spend the time apart in contemplation。〃
It was all Kelson could do to make himself clasp his hands behind his back。 〃We had。 But I； ah； hoped that this…departure from strict conformance with your habit；〃 he nodded toward her veil； 〃might mean that…〃
As he groped for words； she snared him with her eyes。
〃Might mean what； my lord？〃 she whispered。 〃That my vocation as a religious is wavering？ Well； it is。 And I lied to you before； my lord。 You are the cause of it。〃
He could feel his pulsebeat soar as the blood pounded in his ears； and he was not sure the words would e out as he gazed down into her eyes。
〃Sweet； dear lady； don't toy with me；〃 he breathed。 〃If I thought you were lying to me right now； I might not recover。 And I won't chance finding out； either。 Sometimes our powers tell us far too much。〃
〃Do they tell you that I think I love you； Kelson Haldane？〃 she said softly。 〃Do they tell you that when I was arranging the greenery for your knight's vigil； I pretended it was for our nuptial celebrations？〃
Slowly he brought his hands from behind him and raised them toward her face； daring to ease back the veil。
〃There can be a true celebration of our nuptial vows at the end of the summer； when I return；〃 he whispered。 〃Is that what you want？〃
〃I…think so； my lord；〃 she breathed。 She raised one hand to brush her fingertips across his lips。 〃But we should not speak of it now。 We…〃
To keep any further protest from lessening that incredible admission。 Kelson crushed his mouth to hers； her face between his hands。 He could feel the sweet； aching rush of fire stirring in his loins as her lips parted under his； hesitant at first； then more bold； and he thrust his fingers deeper into her hair to draw her closer； both of them trembling。 The motion dislodged the hairpins； and masses of blue…black hair tumbled down his hands； each strand an electric tingle across his skin。
〃My lord； we mustn't；〃 she managed to whisper； drawing back with a doe's frightened eyes； though her arms had slipped around his waist as they kissed and held him still。
Smiling； he pulled two great handfuls of her hair over her shoulders and buried his face in them briefly； inhaling of her perfume。
〃What mustn't we do； my princess； my queen？〃 he murmured； raising his eyes to hers again and trailing a strand of her hair against her cheek。 〃Did you not just say that you think you love me？ And most assuredly； I do love you。〃
〃It's too soon；〃 she whispered。 〃I must have more time to think。 I never meant that we should make any promises until the end of summer； after we'd had the chance to consider…ah； my lord！〃
While she made her protests。 Kelson had allowed one hand to fiddle with the ties at the neck of her gown； at the same time nuzzling tiny kisses along her temples and eyelids。 An opening parted in the fine blue wool； and he slipped his hand gently within to cup the curve of a breast。
〃I told you before； I was not made of iron；〃 he murmured。
〃Nor am I；〃 she said； withdrawing his hand but then kissing the back of it； still trembling。 〃But we must not do what both our hearts urge。 Not now。 Not here。〃
〃Then； where； my heart； and when？〃 he insisted； breathing a kiss across her palm and brushing it with his tongue。 〃I pledge you a king's love； Rothana。 I would make you queen of my land as well as my heart。〃
Shaking her head； Rothana drew herself straighter with a sob and turned her hand so that it only clasped his； safe from his lips。
〃My lord； I pray you； do not do this to me。 You are a king； and may take what you please； where and when you will； but I am still under vows。 I pray you to respect my habit。〃
Kelson smiled wistfully and brushed the back of his free hand against her veil； then against her cheek。
〃Does one under vows take such a veil； my lady； or wear her hair so fetchingly tumbled？〃
She swallowed and averted her eyes。 〃I should not have worn this veil； my lord。 It was a vanity that I shall probably regret。 I must repent me of it； when next I confess。〃
〃Best not confess it to Father Duncan； then；〃 Kelson murmured； smiling still； 〃for he has been my confessor for many years。 If I tell him I wish to take you as my bride； he will give you a strict penance for enticing me thus。〃
She extricated her hand from his and pulled off her veil the rest of the way； giving it to him to hold while she half turned away to retie the neck of her habit。
〃Father Duncan is no longer my confessor； my lord。 Haven't you heard？ The archbishop has forbidden him to confess anyone but you； Dhugal； and Morgan。〃
The revelation was like a dash of cold water in Kelson's face。 He had wondered at Duncan's reticence to talk about his conversation with Cardiel after the privy council meeting。 He could feel the ardor drain out of his body as if someone had pulled a plug as he straightened from picking up Rothana's fallen hairpins。
〃What do you mean； he's forbidden it？ Duncan isn't suspended。〃
〃No； but he's been ordered to cease voluntarily all public function as a priest。 Haven't you noticed that he's not celebrated Mass at the cathedral since Wednesday？〃
Kelson watched numbly； almost hypnotized； as her fingers began plaiting the thick strands of hair that； not minutes before； had set every nerve atingle。
〃But that's because he's supposed to be sick； so he won't have to go to the synod；〃 Kelson managed to say。 〃He said Mass this morning。〃
〃Yes； for you； Dhugal； and Morgan； very early； in the Chapel Royal。 Duchess Meraude told me。 Didn't you wonder why no one else was there？ It's Sunday； after all。〃
〃Well； I~〃
She coiled her braid neatly at the back of her head and secured it with the pins she took from Kelson。
〃Of course you didn't。 You're all excited about riding off on your quest for Saint Camber…and that's as it should be。 He wouldn't want to spoil it for you。 You've already agreed to address the synod； after all。 What more could one ask？〃
〃I thought there wouldn't be any further repercussions yet；〃 Kelson murmured。 〃No one has said anything all week。〃
〃No； but you can be sure they're thinking it。 Fortunately； Duncan is well liked and respected。 And Dhugal may turn out to be an unexpected asset。 A priest with a legitimate son is unusual enough that one who's also Deryni may not make that much difference to the average person。 The bishops will have to grind through the process of officially changing the law； but that may not be before the end of Lent。 They've got bishops to discipline and new ones to elect； after all。〃
As she put on her veil again； though she left her face uncovered。 Kelson considered all that she had said。
〃You're right；〃 he murmured。 〃Now is not the time or place for us。〃 He glanced at his feet； then looked up at her again。
〃But when will be our time and place； Rothana？ Did you mean what passed between us earlier； or were you only