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a few moments he would be giving them one hell of a quote。
The next thing he said though was not a lot of use to them。 One of the officials of the party had irritably decided that the President was clearly not in a mood to read the deliciously turned speech that had been written for him； and had flipped the switch on the remote control device in his pocket。 Away in front of them a huge white dome that bulged against the sky cracked down in the middle； split； and slowly folded itself down into the ground。 Everyone gasped although they had known perfectly well it was going to do that because they had built it that way。
Beneath it lay uncovered a huge starship； one hundred and fifty metres long； shaped like a sleek running shoe； perfectly white and mindboggingly beautiful。 At the heart of it； unseen； lay a small gold box which carried within it the most brain…wretching device ever conceived； a device which made this starship unique in the history of the galaxy； a device after which the ship had been named … The Heart of Gold。
〃Wow〃； said Zaphod Beeblebrox to the Heart of Gold。 There wasn't much else he could say。
He said it again because he knew it would annoy the press。
〃Wow。〃
The crowd turned their faces back towards him expectantly。 He winked at Trillian who raised her eyebrows and widened her eyes at him。 She knew what he was about to say and thought him a terrible showoff。
〃That is really amazing；〃 he said。 〃That really is truly amazing。 That is so amazingly amazing I think I'd like to steal it。〃
A marvellous Presidential quote； absolutely true to form。 The crowd laughed appreciatively； the newsmen gleefully punched buttons on their Sub…Etha News…Matics and the President grinned。
As he grinned his heart screamed unbearably and he fingered the small Paralyso…Matic bomb that nestled quietly in his pocket。
Finally he could bear it no more。 He lifted his heads up to the sky； let out a wild whoop in major thirds； threw the bomb to the ground and ran forward through the sea of suddenly frozen smiles。
Chapter 5
Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz was not a pleasant sight； even for other Vogons。 His highly domed nose rose high above a small piggy forehead。 His dark green rubbery skin was thick enough for him to play the game of Vogon Civil Service politics； and play it well； and waterproof enough for him to survive indefinitely at sea depths of up to a thousand feet with no ill effects。
Not that he ever went swimming of course。 His busy schedule would not allow it。 He was the way he was because billions of years ago when the Vogons had first crawled out of the sluggish primeval seas of Vogsphere； and had lain panting and heaving on the planet's virgin shores。。。 when the first rays of the bright young Vogsol sun had shone across them that morning； it was as if the forces of evolution ad simply given up on them there and then； had turned aside in disgust and written them off as an ugly and unfortunate mistake。 They never evolved again； they should never have survived。
The fact that they did is some kind of tribute to the thick…willed slug…brained stubbornness of these creatures。 Evolution？ they said to themselves； Who needs it？； and what nature refused to do for them they simply did without until such time as they were able to rectify the grosser anatomical inconveniences with surgery。
Meanwhile； the natural forces on the planet Vogsphere had been working overtime to make up for their earlier blunder。 They brought forth scintillating jewelled scuttling crabs； which the Vogons ate； smashing their shells with iron mallets； tall aspiring trees with breathtaking slenderness and colour which the Vogons cut down and burned the crab meat with； elegant gazelle…like creatures with silken coats and dewy eyes which the Vogons would catch and sit on。 They were no use as transport because their backs would snap instantly； but the Vogons sat on them anyway。
Thus the planet Vogsphere whiled away the unhappy millennia until the Vogons suddenly discovered the principles of interstellar travel。 Within a few short Vog years every last Vogon had migrated to the Megabrantis cluster； the political hub of the Galaxy and now formed the immensely powerful backbone of the Galactic Civil Service。 They have attempted to acquire learning； they have attempted to acquire style and social grace； but in most respects the modern Vogon is little different from his primitive forebears。 Every year they import twenty…seven thousand scintillating jewelled scuttling crabs from their native planet and while away a happy drunken night smashing them to bits with iron mallets。
Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz was a fairly typical Vogon in that he was thoroughly vile。 Also； he did not like hitch hikers。
Somewhere in a small dark cabin buried deep in the intestines of Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz's flagship； a small match flared nervously。 The owner of the match was not a Vogon； but he knew all about them and was right to be nervous。 His name was Ford Prefect2。
He looked about the cabin but could see very little； strange monstrous shadows loomed and leaped with the tiny flickering flame； but all was quiet。 He breathed a silent thank you to the Dentrassis。 The Dentrassis are an unruly tribe of gourmands； a wild but pleasant bunch whom the Vogons had recently taken to employing as catering staff on their long haul fleets； on the strict understanding that they keep themselves very much to themselves。
This suited the Dentrassis fine； because they loved Vogon money； which is one of the hardest currencies in space； but loathed the Vogons themselves。 The only sort of Vogon a Dentrassi liked to see was an annoyed Vogon。
It was because of this tiny piece of information that Ford Prefect was not now a whiff of hydrogen； ozone and carbon monoxide。
He heard a slight groan。 By the light of the match he saw a heavy shape moving slightly on the floor。 Quickly he shook the match out； reached in his pocket； found what he was looking for and took it out。 He crouched on the floor。 The shape moved again。
Ford Prefect said： 〃I bought some peanuts。〃
Arthur Dent moved； and groaned again； muttering incoherently。
〃Here； have some；〃 urged Ford； shaking the packet again； 〃if you've never been through a matter transference beam before you've probably lost some salt and protein。 The beer you had should have cushioned your system a bit。〃
〃Whhhrrrr。。。〃 said Arthur Dent。 He opened his eyes。
〃It's dark；〃 he said。
〃Yes；〃 said Ford Prefect； 〃it's dark。〃
〃No light；〃 said Arthur Dent。 〃Dark； no light。〃
One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about human beings was their habit of continually stating and repeating the obvious； as in It's a nice day； or You're very tall； or Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty…foot well； are you alright？ At first Ford had formed a theory to account for this strange behaviour。 If human beings don't keep exercising their lips； he thought； their mouths probably seize up。 After a few months' consideration and observation he abandoned this theory in favour of a new one。 If they don't keep on exercising their lips； he th