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down； and reading that notice； passes by； and hunts for a seat on which
children are permitted to rest； and there he seats himself； careful not to
touch the woodwork with his muddy boots。 Imagine a seat in Regent's or
St。 James's Park labelled 〃Only for grown…ups！〃 Every child for five
miles round would be trying to get on that seat； and hauling other children
off who were on。 As for any 〃grown…up；〃 he would never be able to get
within half a mile of that seat for the crowd。 The German small boy； who
has accidentally sat down on such without noticing； rises with a start when
his error is pointed out to him； and goes away with down…cast head；
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brushing to the roots of his hair with shame and regret。
Not that the German child is neglected by a paternal Government。 In
German parks and public gardens special places （Spielplatze） are provided
for him； each one supplied with a heap of sand。 There he can play to his
heart's content at making mud pies and building sand castles。 To the
German child a pie made of any other mud than this would appear an
immoral pie。 It would give to him no satisfaction： his soul would
revolt against it。
〃That pie；〃 he would say to himself； 〃was not； as it should have been；
made of Government mud specially set apart for the purpose； it was nor
manufactured in the place planned and maintained by the Government for
the making of mud pies。 It can bring no real blessing with it； it is a
lawless pie。〃 And until his father had paid the proper fine； and he had
received his proper licking； his conscience would continue to trouble him。
Another excellent piece of material for obtaining excitement in
Germany is the simple domestic perambulator。 What you may do with a
〃kinder…wagen；〃 as it is called； and what you may not； covers pages of
German law； after the reading of which； you conclude that the man who
can push a perambulator through a German town without breaking the law
was meant for a diplomatist。 You must not loiter with a perambulator；
and you must not go too fast。 You must not get in anybody's way with a
perambulator； and if anybody gets in your way you must get out of their
way。 If you want to stop with a perambulator； you must go to a place
specially appointed where perambulators may stop； and when you get
there you MUST stop。 You must not cross the road with a perambulator；
if you and the baby happen to live on the other side； that is your fault。
You must not leave your perambulator anywhere； and only in certain
places can you take it with you。 I should say that in Germany you could
go out with a perambulator and get into enough trouble in half an hour to
last you for a month。 Any young Englishman anxious for a row with the
police could not do better than come over to Germany and bring his
perambulator with him。
In Germany you must not leave your front door unlocked after ten
o'clock at night； and you must not play the piano in your own house after
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eleven。 In England I have never felt I wanted to play the piano myself；
or to hear anyone else play it； after eleven o'clock at night； but that is a
very different thing to being told that you must not play it。 Here； in
Germany； I never feel that I really care for the piano until eleven o'clock；
then I could sit and listen to the 〃Maiden's Prayer；〃 or the Overture to
〃Zampa；〃 with pleasure。 To the law…loving German； on the other hand；
music after eleven o'clock at night ceases to be music； it becomes sin； and
as such gives him no satisfaction。
The only individual throughout Germany who ever dreams of taking
liberties with the law is the German student； and he only to a certain well…
defined point。 By custom； certain privileges are permitted to him； but
even these are strictly limited and clearly understood。 For instance； the
German student may get drunk and fall asleep in the gutter with no other
penalty than that of having the next morning to tip the policeman who has
found him and brought him home。 But for this purpose he must choose
the gutters of side… streets。 The German student； conscious of the rapid
approach of oblivion； uses all his remaining energy to get round the corner；
where he may collapse without anxiety。 In certain districts he may ring
bells。 The rent of flats in these localities is lower than in other quarters
of the town； while the difficulty is further met by each family preparing
for itself a secret code of bell…ringing by means of which it is known
whether the summons is genuine or not。 When visiting such a household
late at night it is well to be acquainted with this code； or you may； if
persistent； get a bucket of water thrown over you。
Also the German student is allowed to put out lights at night； but there
is a prejudice against his putting out too many。 The larky German
student generally keeps count； contenting himself with half a dozen lights
per night。 Likewise； he may shout and sing as he walks home； up till
half…past two； and at certain restaurants it is permitted to him to put his
arm round the Fraulein's waist。 To prevent any suggestion of
unseemliness； the waitresses at restaurants frequented by students are
always carefully selected from among a staid and elderly classy of women；
by reason of which the German student can enjoy the delights of flirtation
without fear and without reproach to anyone。
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They are a law…abiding people； the Germans。
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CHAPTER X
Baden from the visitor's point of viewBeauty of the early morning； as
viewed from the preceding afternoonDistance；