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it well worth while； he said； for the people of Hartford to go to the
expense of Gerhardt's art education。 He added that it would be better to
get the judgment of a sculptor。 So they brought over John Quincy Adams
Ward； who； like all the others； came away bewitched with these young
people and their struggles for the sake of art。 Ward said：
〃If any stranger had told me that this 'prentice did not model that thing
from plaster…casts I should not have believed it。 It's full of
crudities； but it's full of genius； too。 Hartford must send him to Paris
for two years； then； if the promise holds good； keep him there three
more。〃
When he was gone Mrs。 Clemens said：
〃Youth； we won't wait for Hartford to do it。 It would take too long。
Let us send the Gerhardts to Paris ourselves； and say nothing about it to
any one else。〃
So the Gerhardts； provided with funds and an arrangement that would
enable them to live for five years in Paris if necessary； were started
across the sea without further delay。
Clemens and his wife were often doing something of this sort。 There was
seldom a time that they were not paying the way of some young man or
woman through college； or providing means and opportunity for development
in some special field of industry。
CXXXIV
LITERARY PROJECTS AND A MONUMENT TO ADAM
Mark Twain's literary work languished during this period。 He had a world
of plans； as usual； and wrote plentifully； but without direction or
conclusion。 〃A Curious Experience；〃 which relates a circumstance told to
him by an army officer； is about the most notable of the few completed
manuscripts of this period。
Of the books projected （there were several）； a burlesque manual of
etiquette would seem to have been the most promising。 Howells had faith
in it； and of the still remaining fragments a few seem worth quoting：
AT BILLIARDS
If your ball glides along in the intense and immediate vicinity of
the object…ball； and a count seems exquisitely imminent； lift one
leg； then one shoulder； then squirm your body around in sympathy
with the direction of the moving ball； and at the instant when the
ball seems on the point of colliding throw up both of your arms
violently。 Your cue will probably break a chandelier； but no
matter； you have done what you could to help the count。
AT THE DOG…FIGHT
If it occur in your block； courteously give way to strangers
desiring a view； particularly ladies。
Avoid showing partiality toward the one dog； lest you hurt the
feelings of the other one。
Let your secret sympathies and your compassion be always with the
under dog in the fightthis is magnanimity； but bet on the other
onethis is business。
AT POKER
If you draw to a flush and fail to fill； do not continue the
conflict。
If you hold a pair of trays； and your opponent is blind； and it
costs you fifty to see him； let him remain unperceived。
If you hold nothing but ace high； and by some means you know that
the other man holds the rest of the aces； and he calls； excuse
yourself； let him call again another time。
WALL STREET
If you live in the country； buy at 80； sell at 40。 Avoid all forms
of eccentricity。
IN THE RESTAURANT
When you wish to get the waiter's attention； do not sing out 〃Say！〃
Simply say 〃Szt！〃
His old abandoned notion of 〃Hamlet〃 with an added burlesque character
came back to him and stirred his enthusiasm anew； until even Howells
manifested deep interest in the matter。 One reflects how young Howells
must have been in those days； how full of the joy of existence； also how
mournfully he would consider such a sacrilege now。
Clemens proposed almost as many things to Howells as his brother Orion
proposed to him。 There was scarcely a letter that didn't contain some
new idea； with a request for advice or co…operation。 Now it was some
book that he meant to write some day； and again it would be a something
that he wanted Howells to write。
Once he urged Howells to make a play； or at least a novel； out of Orion。
At another time he suggested as material the 〃Rightful Earl of Durham。〃
He is a perfectly stunning literary bonanza； and must be dug up and put
on the market。 You must get his entire biography out of him and have it
ready for Osgood's magazine。 Even if it isn't worth printing； you must
have it anyway； and use it one of these days in one of your stories or in
a play。
It was this notion about 'The American Claimant' which somewhat later
would lead to a collaboration with Howells on a drama； and eventually to
a story of that title。
But Clemens's chief interest at this time lay in publishing； rather than
in writing。 His association with Osgood inspired him to devise new
ventures of profit。 He planned a 'Library of American Humor'； which
Howells （soon to leave the Atlantic） and 〃Charley〃 Clark＇Charles
Hopkins Clark； managing editor of the Hartford Courant。＇were to edit；
and which Osgood would publish； for subscription sale。 Without realizing
it； Clemens was taking his first step toward becoming his own publisher。
His contract with Osgood for 'The Prince and the Pauper' made him
essentially that； for by the terms of it he agreed to supply all the
money for the making of the book； and to pay Osgood a royalty of seven
and one…half per cent。 for selling it； reversing the usual conditions。
The contract for the Library of Humor was to be a similar one； though in
this case Osgood was to have a larger royalty return； and to share
proportionately in the expense and risk。 Mark Twain was entering into a
field where he did not belong； where in the end he would harvest only
disaster and regret。
One curious project came to an end in 1881the plan for a monument to
Adam。 In a sketch written a great many years later Mark Twain tells of
the memorial which the Rev。 Thomas K。 Beecher and himself once proposed
to erect to our great common ancestor。 The story is based on a real
incident。 Clemens； in Elmira one day （it was October； 1879）； heard of a
jesting proposal made by F。 G。 Hall to erect a monument in Elmira to
Adam。 The idea promptly caught Mark Twain's fancy。 He observed to
Beecher that the human race really showed a pretty poor regard for its
great progenitor； who was about to be deposed by Darwin's simian； not to
pay him the tribute of a single monument。 Mankind； he said； would
probably accept the monkey ancestor； and in time the very name of Adam
would be forgotten。 He declared Mr。 Hall's suggestion to be a sound
idea。
Beecher agreed that there were many reasons why a monument should be
erected to Adam； and suggested that a subscription be started for the
purpose。 Certain business men； seeing an opportunity for advertising the
city； took the matter semi…seriously； and offered to contribute large
sums in the interest of the enterprise。 Then it was agreed that Congress
should be petitioned to sanction the idea