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〃Uck！〃
It had always seemed an enigma that her father； so desperate to be part of American society in so many ways； also wanted not to lose his Russian heritage。 It was he who had insisted she take Russian instead of French； the elegant language most of her friends took。 Russian classes were filled with nerds with Coke…bottle…bottom glasses； thick necks； and pimply faces。 She hated them； and she hated the language in which nothing seemed to make sense。 She thought she'd rather study Martian。
〃You have a test today？〃 Greg asked。
〃Mid…term。 I got sick and threw up before I took it。 I think I might have failed it。〃
''You've got to apply yourself；'' Greg said； stretching into the last patch of sunlight on the coping。 〃It's easy if you try。 Everything's easy。〃
''For you； maybe。〃
〃For you； too。 We're not so different as you think。〃
〃But I don't understand a thing！〃 she wailed。 〃I've gone to every class； I take notes； but I don't know what it is I'm writing。〃
〃Maybe it's the teacher； then。 Who've you got？〃 Having graduated the same junior high six years before； Greg knew everyone。
〃Mr。 Broker。〃
〃Broker sucks；〃 Greg said。 〃I'll go have a talk with Bob Hayes； the principal； tomorrow after classes。 Hayes knows what a prick Broker is。 Peter Borachov's the best Russian teacher。 I'll get you transferred to his class。〃
〃I'll still hate it。〃
〃Don't be a dope。 It's neat。 You'll like it； I promise。〃
〃Really？〃
〃Really。〃
〃Gee。 Great！〃 And just like that。 Tori's insoluble problem had been solved。 It had taken Greg to e up with the answer。 Greg always had the answers。
All of a sudden that afternoon was so peaceful； so perfect。 But not for long。 Greg； laughing； rolling over； reaching out； taking her with him into the pool。 Down； down； down； into the water； Greg's wide； powerful hand pressed against the top of her head； keeping her deep in the water while the air running out burned her lungs and a kind of animal panic gripped her so that she flailed out with her arms and legs and； at last； as she began to cry； feeling the weight e off her； Greg lifting her upward into the air and the light。
〃Stop！ Stop！ Stop！ Don't ever do that again！〃 She could remember him peering into her face while she wept and gasped； until she said； 〃Why are you looking at me？〃
〃To see your face change；〃 Greg said。
〃How did my face change？〃 Tori asked； wiping away her tears。 This was an altogether grown…up conversation； and she had already forgotten her fear and her anger。
〃I can't tell you；〃 Greg said； 〃but I can show you。〃 He put her hand on his head。 〃Push me down into the water。 Don't let me e up。〃
〃Greg； don't be stupid。 Why should I want…〃
〃Just do it； Tor！〃 he thundered； his eyes alight with energy； so that Tori was helpless to do anything other than ply。
She pushed his head under the water。 It took both her hands； her arms rigid； her legs fluttering back and forth in the water for added power。 Her head was just above the surface of the pool。 She could remember how the sunlight cut a last dazzle on the water and then； sinking below the tops of the palms； left the pool in blue twilight。 The pumps had cut off； and the water was utterly still； crystal clear。
Tori looked down at her brother submerged as； terrifyingly； she had been moments before。 Was this some kind of test； she wondered； a way to improve his breath control？ She liked being made part of his program； loved the sense of Tori and Greg versus Mom and Dad； his strength added to hers； another layer of callus to keep out the parental intrusions。
They were alone in Diana's Garden； alone in the cool water； just the two of them taking part in a mysterious process； like an ancient rite of which Tori had no knowledge。 And the not knowing somehow added to her excitement； as if she were participating in a really adult thing； Greg trusting her as if she were already grown up； and she thought； it was worth being terrorized by him for moments such as these。
Time passed。 Ripples on the skin of the pool； a string of tiny bubbles leaking from the corner of Greg's mouth。 She could feel him trying to rise； and she fluttered her feet harder； gaining purchase and leverage at the same time； pushing down to meet the increased pressure。
And then a bluebird swooped down from its perch in a nearby tree； skimmed the water as if wanting to see what lay below； and Tori thought； What am I doing？ I am holding my brother underwater； and I don't know how long he's been unable to breathe。 She felt a shiver of fright。
With a convulsive gesture she took her hands off the top of Greg's head； dove down； pulled him back to the surface。 His face was white； his eyes oddly dark。 He looked like a different person； as if the proximity to death had somehow changed him。 Something strange and cold crept through Tori's veins。
〃There；〃 Greg said； gripping her shoulders hard to be certain that she was staring directly at him。 〃Do you see？ I couldn't tell you； but I've shown you； haven't I？ 〃
Tori； sitting opposite Russell Slade in futuristic Roppongi； asked herself why she had recalled that specific incident。 Perhaps it was because the emotions gripping her heart were so disturbing that she had to conjure even more disturbing thoughts to try to block them out。 Wasn't it that moment； seeing Greg's changed face； when Tori's feet were set upon her path； that she knew she would not be satisfied until she stared death in the face？
Tori thought she wanted to explore this horrific idea further； but the essence of Russell kept insinuating itself into her consciousness…that new side of him she had glimpsed in the corrida when he had been near death； when； later； she had been so vulnerable； such an easy target for him； and instead of making the most of his advantage； he had gathered her into his arms。
Tori in Tokyo now； recalling Tokyo then； ten years ago； when she was ever so young； ever so smart； ever so vulnerable。 She had walked a different road then。 She had been cocky； so sure of herself； of her abilities。 The thought of defeat was merely a dream； the contemplation of her own death inconceivable。
Greg had flown in； one of the few occasions he had had the time to visit her in Japan。 It was odd； their worlds were so different； and yet so alike。 They both trained vigorously； both had a kind of monodirectional bent that allowed them to concentrate on the flood of information they had to learn； then translate it into action。 They were masters of both the cerebral and the physical； learning what a valuable modity the bination could be。
Though they were in touch infrequently； and saw each other even less； they still remained close。 Perhaps it was their parents that made them so； an unspoken mutual need to band together against the enormous pressures at home in Diana's Garden。
In Tokyo they had gone out drinking。 It was a recreation neither had the time nor the inclination to pursue on a regular basis。 Their lives were so disciplined； so regularized； so military； that the chance to kick back and break loose was irresistible。 It was also Tori's firm belief…a very Japanese concept…that real truths； the full heart； not the empty symbol； could only be expressed while drunk。