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to work for that son of a bitch Don。 And it was always a bad idea to return to a pany after you'd been fired…for any reason； under any arrangement。 Everybody knew that。
But on the other hand； if I agreed to work as a consultant； it would get rid of my shelf…life problem。 And it would get me out of the house。 It would acplish a lot of things。 After a pause； I said； 〃Listen； Tim； let me think about it。〃
〃You want to call me back？〃
〃Okay。 Yes。〃
〃When will you call？〃 he said。
The tension in his voice was clear。 I said； 〃You've got some urgency about this 。。。〃
〃Yeah； well； some。 Like I said； that contract's driving us crazy。 We have five programmers from the original team practically living out at that Xymos plant。 And they're not getting anywhere on this problem。 So if you're not going to help us； we have to look elsewhere； right away。〃
〃Okay； I'll call you tomorrow；〃 I said。
〃Tomorrow morning？〃 he said； hinting。
〃Okay；〃 I said。 〃Yes； tomorrow morning。〃
Tim's call should have made me feel better about things； but it didn't。 I took the baby to the park； and pushed her in the swing for a while。 Amanda liked being pushed in the swing。 She could do it for twenty or thirty minutes at a time； and always cried when I took her out。 Later I sat on the concrete curb of the sandbox while she crawled around； and pulled herself up to standing on the concrete turtles and other playthings。 One of the older toddlers knocked her over； but she didn't cry； she just got back up。 She seemed to like being around the older kids。 I watched her； and thought about going back to work。
〃Of course you told them yes；〃 Ellen said to me。 We were in the kitchen。 She had just arrived； her black suitcase unpacked in the corner。 Ellen looked exactly the same； still rail…thin； energetic； blond； hyper。 My sister never seemed to age。 She was drinking a cup of tea from teabags that she had brought with her。 Special organic oolong tea from a special shop in San Francisco。 That hadn't changed； either…Ellen had always been fussy about food； even as a kid。 As an adult； she traveled around with her own teas； her own salad dressings； her own vitamins neatly arranged in little glassine packs。
〃No； I didn't；〃 I said。 〃I didn't tell them yes。 I said I'd think about it。〃
〃Think about it？ Are you kidding？ Jack； you have to go back to work。 You know you do。〃 She stared at me； appraising。 〃You're depressed。〃
〃I'm not。〃
〃You should have some of this tea；〃 she said。 〃All that coffee is bad for your nerves。〃
〃Tea has more caffeine than coffee。〃
〃Jack。 You have to go back to work。〃
〃I know that； Ellen。〃
〃And if it's a consulting job 。。。 wouldn't that be perfect？ Solve all your problems？〃
〃I don't know；〃 I said。
〃Really？ What don't you know。〃
〃I don't know if I'm getting the full story；〃 I said。 〃I mean； if Xymos is having all this trouble； how e Julia hasn't said anything about it to me？〃
Ellen shook her head。 〃It sounds like Julia isn't saying much of anything to you these days。〃 She stared at me。 〃So why didn't you accept right away？〃
〃I need to check around first。〃
〃Check what； Jack？〃 Her tone conveyed disbelief。 Ellen was acting like I had a psychological problem that needed to be fixed。 My sister was starting to get to me； and we'd only been together a few minutes。 My older sister； treating me like I was a kid again。 I stood up。 〃Listen； Ellen；〃 I said。 〃I've spent my life in this business； and I know how it works。 There's two possible reasons Don wants me back。 The first is the pany's in a jam and they think I can help。〃
〃That's what they said。〃
〃Right。 That's what they said。 But the other possibility is that they've made an incredible mess of things and by now it can't be fixed…and they know it。〃
〃So they want somebody to blame？〃
〃Right。 They want a donkey to pin the tail on。〃
She frowned。 I saw her hesitate。 〃Do you really think so？〃
〃I don't know； that's the point；〃 I said。 〃But I have to find out。〃
〃Which you will do by 。。。〃
〃By making some calls。 Maybe paying a surprise visit to the fab building tomorrow。〃
〃Okay。 That sounds right to me。〃
〃I'm glad I have your approval。〃 I couldn't keep the irritation out of my voice。
〃Jack；〃 she said。 She got up and hugged me。 〃I'm just worried about you； that's all。〃
〃I appreciate that；〃 I said。 〃But you're not helping me。〃
〃Okay。 Then what can I do to help you？〃
〃Watch the kids； while I make some calls。〃
I figured I would first call Ricky Morse； the guy I'd seen in the supermarket buying Huggies。 I had a long relationship with Ricky； he worked at Xymos and he was casual enough about information that he might tell me what was really going on there。 The only problem was that Ricky was based in the Valley； and he'd already told me that the action was all at the fab building。 But he was a place for me to start。
I called his office； but the receptionist said； 〃I'm sorry； Mr。 Morse is not in the office。〃
〃When is he expected back？〃
〃I really couldn't say。 Do you want voice mail？〃
I left Ricky a voice…mail message。 Then I called his home number。 His wife answered。 Mary was getting her Ph。D。 in French history； I imagined her studying； bouncing the baby； with a book open on her lap。 I said； 〃How are you； Mary？〃
〃I'm fine； Jack。〃
〃How's the baby？ Ricky tells me you never get diaper rash。 I'm jealous。〃 I tried to sound casual。 Just a social call。
Mary laughed。 〃She's a good baby； and we didn't have colic； thank God。 But Ricky hasn't been around for the rashes；〃 she said。 〃We've had some。〃
I said； 〃Actually； I'm looking for Ricky。 Is he there？〃
〃No； Jack。 He's been gone all week。 He's out at that fab plant in Nevada。〃
〃Oh； right。〃 I remembered now that Ricky had mentioned that； when we had met in the supermarket。
〃Have you been out to that plant？〃 Mary said。 I thought I detected an uneasy tone。
〃No； I haven't； but…〃
〃Julia is there a lot； isn't she？ What does she say about it？〃 Definitely worried。
〃Well； not much。 I gather they have new technology that's very hush…hush。 Why？〃
She hesitated。 〃Maybe it's my imagination 。。。〃
〃What is？〃
〃Well； sometimes when Ricky calls； he sounds kind of weird to me。〃
〃How？〃
〃I'm sure he's distracted and working hard； but he says some strange things。 He doesn't always make a lot of sense。 And he seems evasive。 Like he's； I don't know； hiding something。〃
〃Hiding something 。。。〃
She gave a self…deprecating laugh。 〃I even thought maybe he's having an affair。 You know； that woman Mae Chang is out there； and he always liked her。 She's so pretty。〃 Mae Chang used to work in my division at MediaTronics。 〃I hadn't heard she was at the fab plant。〃
〃Yes。 I think a lot of the people who used to work for you are there； now。〃
〃Well；〃 I said。 〃I don't think Ricky is having an affair； Mary。 It's just not like him。 And it's not like Mae。〃
〃It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for；〃 she said； apparently referring to Mae。 〃And I'm still nursing； so I haven't lost my weight yet； I mean； my thighs are as big as sides of beef。〃
〃I don't think that…〃
〃They rub together when I walk。 Squishy。〃
〃Mary； I'm sure…〃
〃Is Julia okay； Jack？ She's not a