按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
it for it was precisely the sort of thing which she would have wanted us to do。
Soon my house was never empty； and I made the amazing discovery that should I bee bored in the midst of this heated and drunken pany it was a simple matter for me to get up and go into my library and begin writing； for all the drunken guests simply went on with each other； hardly noticing what I did and only rousing themselves to greet me when I returned。
Understand； I did not bee a friend to any of these dishonorable or disgraced creatures。 I was only a warm…hearted host and spectator who listened without criticism and never…until dawn…turned anyone away。
But it was a far cry from my former solitude； and without the strengthening blood of Akasha； and perhaps without my quarrel with Avicus and Mael； I would never have taken this step。
And so my house became crowded and noisy； and wine sellers sought me out to offer their new vintages； and young men came to me； begging me to listen to their songs。
Even a few fashionable philosophers appeared at my door from time to time； and once in a while a great teacher； and these I enjoyed immensely； making very certain that the lamps were very dim and that the rooms were most shadowy； so frightened was I that the sharp…minded might discover that I was not what I pretended to be。
As for my trips to the shrine and Those Who Must Be Kept； I knew and traveled in total secrecy for my mind was more securely cloaked。
And on certain nights…when the banquet in my house could well do without me…and I held myself to be entirely safe from all intrusion； I went to the shrine and did the work which I supposed would fort my poor Akasha and Enkil。
During these years； rather than undertake mosaics which had proved very difficult for me in Antioch； though I had succeeded； I made murals on the walls of the mon kind seen in so many Roman houses； of frolicking gods and goddesses in gardens of eternal springtime and bounteous flowers and fruit。
I was hard at work one evening； singing to myself； happy among all the pots of paint when I suddenly realized that the garden I was faithfully rendering was in fact the garden I had seen when I drank Akasha's blood。
I stopped； sat still on the floor of the shrine； as if I were a child； with crossed legs； and looked up at the venerable Parents。 Was it meant to be？
I had no idea。 The garden looked vaguely familiar。 Had I seen such a garden long before I had drunk Akasha's blood？ I couldn't remember。 And I； Marius； prided myself upon my memory。 I went on with my work。 I covered over a wall and started all over again to render it more nearly perfect。 I made better trees and shrubbery。 I painted the sunlight and the effects of it upon green leaves。
When inspiration left me； I would use my blood drinker delicacy to creep into some fashionable villa outside the walls of the enormous and ever expanding city； and by the faintest light peruse the inevitably lush murals for new figures； new dances； new attitudes and smiles。
Of course I could do this easily without waking anyone in the house； and sometimes I need have no worry of waking anyone； for no one was there。
Rome was immense； busy as ever； but with all the wars； with all the shifting politics and scheming plotters and passing Emperors； people were being banished and recalled regularly； and great houses were often empty for me to quietly wander and enjoy。
Meanwhile； in my house； my banquets had bee so famous that my rooms were always full。 And no matter what my goal for any night； I menced it among the warm pany of drunkards who'd begun their feasting and quarreling before I ever arrived。
〃Ah； Marius； wele！〃 they would cry out as I came into the room。
How I smiled at them all； my treasured pany。
Never did anyone suspect me of anything； and I did grow to love some of these delightful creatures； but always I remembered that I was a predator of men； and could not therefore be loved by them； and so I kept my heart covered as it were。
And so with this mortal fort； the years passed； whilst I kept myself busy with the energy of a madman； either writing in my journals and subsequently burning them； or painting on the walls of the shrine。
Meantime； the wretched serpent worshiping blood drinkers came again； attempting to establish their absurd temple within one of the neglected catabs where mortal Christians no longer gathered； and once again； Avicus and Mael drove them away。
I observed all this； immensely relieved that I had not been called upon to do anything； and painfully remembering when I had slaughtered such a band in Antioch and subsequently fallen into the piteous madness that had cost me the love of Pandora apparently for all time。
But no； not for all time； surely she would e to me； I thought。 I wrote about it in my journals。
I put down my pen； I closed my eyes。 I longed for her。 I prayed that she would e to me。 I envisioned her with her rippling brown hair and melancholy oval face。 I tried to remember with exactitude the shape and the fine color of her dark eyes。
How she had argued with me。 How she had known the poets and philosophers。 How she had been able to reason。 And I； I had mocked her all too much。
I cannot tell you how many years passed in this fashion。
I was aware that even though we did not speak to one another； or even face each other in the street； Avicus and Mael had bee panions to me by their very presence。 And as for their keeping Rome clean of other blood drinkers； I was in their debt。
Now； I didn't pay much attention to what was happening with the government of the Empire as I think you can ascertain from all I've said。
But in truth I cared passionately about the fate of the Empire。 For the Empire to me was the civilized world。 And though I was a secret hunter by night； a filthy killer of humans； nevertheless I was a Roman； and I lived in all other ways a civilized life。
I suppose that I assumed； much like many an old Senator of the time； that sooner or later the endless battles of the Emperors would sort themselves out。 A great man； with the strength of Octavian； would rise to unite the entire world once again。
Meantime the armies would patrol the borders； endlessly driving back the barbarian menace； and if the responsibility fell； over and over again to the armies to choose an Emperor； so be it； as long as the Empire remained intact。
As for the Christians who existed everywhere； I did not know what to make of them at all。 It was a great mystery to me that this little cult； which had begun in Jerusalem of all places； could have grown to such tremendous size。
Before I'd left Antioch； I'd been amazed by the success of Christianity； of how it was being organized； and how it seemed to thrive on division and dissent。
But Antioch was the East as I have said。 That Rome was capitulating to the Christians was beyond my wildest dreams。 Slaves had everywhere gone over to the new religion； but so had men and women of high position。 And persecutions had no effect at all。
Before I continue； however； allow me to point out what other historians have also poin