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serve special cake； and we all drink wine。 A very happy time； Huld。 A very happy time。〃 He wiped his eyes on the corner of his robe； looking all at once grave and grandfatherly； eyes full of an old and childlike joy。 I wanted to kick him； but he went on in happy ignorance of my intent。 〃We give each other gifts； too； in honor of the occasion。 I still have some gifts my father gave me； years ago。〃
〃You bring a monster out of the ship？〃 said Huld。 〃Does this mean that in that long ago time your forefathers brought the monsters to this place？〃
〃Oh； yes。 Certainly。 Our forefathers came。 With the monsters。 To keep Home inviolate； to watch and record。〃
〃Gamesmen were here； then； when your forefathers came？〃
〃Oh； I suppose so； Huld。 Yes。 They must have been； how else would they be here now？ Your people。 And the pawns； of course。〃
〃And the monsters in your pits are the descendents of those your forefathers brought？〃
〃Oh； no； sir；〃 babbled Flogshoulder。 eager with his tiny bits of information。 〃They do not reproduce at all well； sir。 No； many of the monsters in the pits are made in the monster labs。 I will be supervisor there； next term。 Also； we pay the Gifters to bring some from outside。 And some 。。。 well； some 。
〃You may say it； my boy；〃 said Manacle； still kindly with his nostalgic glow。 〃Some are born to our own consecrated monsters； to be reared in special pits and adapted properly for our use。 Waste not； want not。；' He made a high pitched little obscenity of laughter。
〃Interesting。〃 said Huld。 〃Very interesting。 Well。 If you will just show me whatever books there are which describe the defenders； our business may be concluded for a time。〃
〃Oh； my dear Huld。 I thought you understood。 There are no manuals for the defenders！ Either there never were any； and that may well be the case； or Nitch took them when he went。 In any case； it doesn't matter。 They are self…repairing； my dear fellow。 You needn't concern yourself about them。 If we need them； we have only to press that lever down。 Everything else has been done。〃
I could feel Huld's baffled fury from across the room； feel his heat。 〃Dean Manacle。 What will happen when the lever is thrust down？ Do you know？〃
〃Well； of course。 We will be defended。 Haven't I said so again and again。 Really； Huld； sometimes you are very trying。〃
Didir and Dora pushed me deep into the corner； perhaps to avoid touching Huld as he stormed away； followed by the others who were full of twittered miseration。 〃Gamesmen！〃 said Shear。 〃They have no manners。
〃After all our courtesies to him。 Well。 He was simply furious to see that we didn't need his warnings as much as he had thought we would。 Dreadful blow to his ego。 Full of pride； that one is。 Still。 He'll get over it。〃 Manacle； fortably full of his own view of his world。
In a moment they were gone。 Didir let me e to the surface of myself； drove me to the surface of myself like a volcano exploding within me。 I saw shattering lights； felt electric burning and shock； heard her voice； loud； 〃They are wrong； Peter。 Wrong。 That is not the way it was。 I was there。 I was there； I know how it was。〃 Bits of her memory fled across my mind。
A babble erupted inside me； Dora and Trandilar； Wafnor's hearty cheer dimmed in a wild crosstalk which felt like panic； like fury； like fear。 Finally Dora's voice； dark and heavy as velvet； 〃Turn the keys back； Peter。 Turn the keys back and take them away；〃 only to hear Didir once more； 〃No！ It must be done in a certain order； a certain order or it goes。〃
I trembled with vertigo； sick； thrust this way and that by those inside me； without balance or direction。 I screamed silently； 〃Stop！ Stop！〃 and the interior babble ceased。 Then Didir's voice； thrumming like a tight bowstring； held from panic by her ancient will； 〃Did you see the order in which the keys were turned； Peter？ Did you observe？〃 At which I laughed。 She herself had kept me submerged during all that time。 I had only heard what came to my ears。 I felt that tight bowstring thrum； thrum； begin to ravel。 〃Then leave them alone。 Can you lock the door into the corridor？〃 she shrieked at me。
I could do that； and did； before she broke in a shower of fiery sparks which shook every fiber of me； went down every nerve； dropped me to the floor to lie twitching like some maddened or dying thing while I knew what it was that Didir knew。 If the lever in that quiet room behind me were pushed down； something huge and horrible would happen…something final and irretrievable。 And Didir believed it would happen to all the place we were in； to the corridors； the mountains； caverns； to all the black…clad magicians and their servants； to their monsters； their machines； and perhaps…perhaps to the world as well。
11。 Calling Home
I convulsed； there on the floor thrashing like a fresh caught fish。 If anyone had e by； they would have found me there in my own shape； naked as an egg and helpless as any fledgling。 The presence within which had been Didir became a scattered shower of sparkling half…thoughts； fleeting memories； pictures of herself going to this place or that； pictures of someone else I did not know； tall and dark； gold…decked； premonitions of disaster which unmanned me to leave me gasping without ever making connected sense。 Then there was a time； long or short； I never knew； of darkness。 When I came to myself again it was to feel the hard； cold floor beneath my wet cheek where I had lain in my own drool。
After a little time； I was more or less myself again。 I recognized what had happened…panic。 Through all the confusion； I found myself wondering how one of the Gamesmen of Barish could feel panic。 But then。 I told myself； they were more than mere constructs。 They had reality； though they had to use my head to express it…a head which was still splitting with an excruciating pain； pain enough to have panicked me and shut down all the places which the Gamesmen had occupied。 Didir was gone； but so were Dorn and Trandilar； Shattnir and Wafnor。 My head felt empty； vacant and echoing。 The pain diminished almost at once； and I lay against the door of that dreadful room； frightened and quite alone。 I wondered almost hysterically whether they would e back to me again； so felt for Shattnir because she was the one who was hardest； least vulnerable。 Nothing。 Her figure lay in my fingers like a doll； wooden； slightly chill。 Well； there was no time to experiment or wonder。 I had no knowledge of the time which had passed。 I had to find Mavin； quickly； and tell her what I knew。
Furred…Peter grew a pair of wide； fragile ears upon his head； like those of the shadow people； and fled through the halls listening for any movement。 There was no Didir to warn me； and I was vulnerable in those metal corridors。 I fled； promptly losing myself in the maze； unable to fish for thoughts to help me locate myself； following this one and that one at a distance until at last I came to a familiar place from which the mittee room could be found。 I got there； got in…and found it empty。 Mavin was not there。 Whether she had been there。 I could not tell。
I was alone there for a long time； time enough to get hungry； to find my way to a place food was stored for Tall