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'Hey； hold on there；' Elvis put in。 'If it wasn't this SOB； something made one hell of a bang out there。'
'I think I might be able to explain；' said Fergus Shaman。 'There was a bomb in Rex's air car。 It was detonated by remote control from the Nemesis building。 I fear it must have set off the Dilithium Crystals in my spaceship causing the major explosion。 Luckily for us the rear end of this loquacious missile absorbed the impact upon the bunker； sparing our lives。 There's always a logical explanation if you are prepared to stretch credibility far enough；'
'Hang on there。' The voice belonged to Rex。 'What bomb in my air car？'
'The one he placed in it。' Fergus pointed the finger of guilt toward Dalai Dan。 'To destroy the car as soon as you had picked up Mr Presley。'
'Oh I never did；' lied the Living God King。 'As if I would。'
'What about me？' wailed the Sneaky Reekie。 'My reverse gears are buggered also。'
'Talking bomb；' muttered Elvis。 'Pile of horseshit。'
'Oh； I don't know； chief。 Logical progression； life always imitates art； you know。 Remember that science fiction film； Dark Star； on Concorde； when we were on our way to Hong Kong？'
'Shit； yeah。 That where this guy swiped the idea from？'
'Bound to be； chief。'
'But in the movie； the bomb finally blew up。'
'Yeah chief； just what I was thinking。'
'You put a bomb in my air car？' Rex was now shaking the Dalai by the throat。
'Rex； no； please； ouch。 You can't believe him。。。 gag。。。 gurgle。。。 What about our working relationship； your pension plan？ Ow； gulp。。。' Rex took his hands from the holyman's throat and kicked his chair over。 He turned away in fury to confront a bunker wall of no particular interest。 Gloria's face lit up the TV terminal。
'As a special tribute to the Dalai Lama； who cast away his Earthly form this very morning； we are going to screen a selection of humorous out…takes and bloopers from the last series of Nemesis。 These show the more muddled； human side of our beloved Dan and it was his express wish that we show them； should an eventuality such as this occur。'
'You'll get yours； Gloria；' spat the floor…bound Dan from between seriously gritted teeth。 'You see if you don't。'
'We shall； of course interrupt this ic relief with any up…to…the…minute newsflashes of the war currently waging between the Jesuits and the Fundamentalists。 Om…mani…padme…hum。'
Dan took to screaming and thrashing。 It was most unbeing。
28
。。。 yeah； certainly； I work for the department。 And all I'm saying is； if it came through here； it came through me。 Nothing es in or goes out except if it's through me。 It gets checked in。 It gets evaluated。 It gets authenticated； or not； as the case may be。 It gets indexed。 It gets catalogued and it gets filed。 All through me。 Now； the date you are talking about is a date I'm hardly going to forget； am I？ It being the date that the last object ever came through here。 Although； as you can see； I'm sitting at my desk in case something else might e in。 Which is unlikely as the digs have been closed for twenty years。 But I'm still here。 Boring？ A pointless existence？ Twenty years？ funny you should mention it。 Do I get resentful？ Do I get resentful？ Sitting here looking at these four walls； while my life ticks away？ What？
So regarding this object； this very last object that I ever recorded。 And which by implication would indeed appear to be the very object you seek。 And which you would like me to show you。 Buddy； it would be more than my job's worth to pull a stunt like that。 And I'm not messing。 The Suburban Book of the Dead
'There now；' said Mungo。 'Did I or did I not tell you not to panic？' The board members responded somewhat indifferently to Mungo's question。 It was almost as if they needed a mite more convincing。
Jason put up his hand to speak。 'Sir； the fortuitous survival of Dan et al does； if I might dare voice the feelings of the entire board…' （the entire board made 'no such thing' rumblings）'…does take a fair bit of swallowing； credibility wise。'
'Let us not beat about the bush； Morgawr；' Mungo dusted pollen from his lapel； 'something specific on your mind？'
'Well。。。 er。。。' Jason stared about at the surviving board members。 Their faces said； 'Go on； fuck yourself up。' 'Ah； nothing。 A lucky chance。 Fortuitous is the word I shall stand by。'
'Good。 Now regarding your technical staff。 How long before they will be ready for the off？'
'An hour； sir。 Two at the most。'
'And Morgawr； you are totally au fait with the situation； plotwise？'
'Oh yes； sir。' Jason's face bobbed up and down。 'Armageddon； that's what it's all about now； eh？'
Mungo made a thoughtful face。 'Yes； well it is and it isn't。'
'It is and it isn't。' Morgawr tried to look enlightened。 'It is Armageddon； but it's not Armageddon。 Yes I see。 I know it's not the Armageddon。 Which is to say； that although it is our Armageddon； which will appear to be their Armageddon； it is not really the Armageddon。 Which is what you are saying； is it not？'
'What I am saying is that whoever's Armageddon it turns out to be； it must have a happy ending。 One which will satisfy the backers； the Holy Writ and the viewing public。 Raise the ratings； not infuriate the advertisers； and allow me to sleep peacefully in my bed； should I ever wish so to do。 This is the kind of scenario； in fact the exact scenario which you envisage； is it not？'
'Well。。。' said Jason Morgawr。 'Well。。。'
The doors of the Dalai's private lift opened into his equally private apartments。 These occupied the entire floor toward the very apex of the Nemesis pyramid。 The four glazed； sloping walls displayed the panorama of endless blue； beneath which； and in terrible contrast； the artificial cloud heaved like a poison sea。
Gloria took a step forward but checked herself。 Dan's presence still hung in the air。 An unsavoury psychic miasma。 It said； 'Just you try it。' Gloria trembled； assailed by sudden doubt。 She had done the unthinkable。 She had murdered the World's foremost religious figure。 The man which many regarded as God。 That he was unquestionably a merciless tyrant hardly seemed to e into it。 He was worshipped； adored。 Gloria Mundi had murdered God。
And for what？ For the mon good？ For the sake of mankind？ The future of the race？ Gloria shook her head。 Out of revenge； out of a lust for power。 And now she had it； what was she going to do with it？ She realized for the first time that she really had no idea at all。
'e on dear； I'll fix us both a drink。' Ms Vrillium placed a fleshy palm upon the small of Gloria's back。
'Be careful。'
'Careful？' Ms Vrillium marched from the lift； the martial clicks of her steel heels losing themselves in the rich pile of the carpet。
'Can't you feel him？' Gloria was suddenly afraid。
'I can smell that filthy musk he pomaded himself with。 But nothing more。 e on dear； first night nerves is all。'
With faltering steps Gloria entered the apartment。 She had seen it all before。 The fine hangings。 The quilted sofas； their covers woven from the feathers of birds a century dead。 The high…domed display cases； clustered with enigmatic antiques。 The kili