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tg.wizardfirstrule-第50章

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 Richard slid the sword back into its scabbard; put back the anger; feeling the gloom seep through him once again as he resumed his scan of the countryside and sky。 He stood and walked around to relieve the cramps in his legs; then sat once more against the rock; inconsolable。
 
 An hour before his watch was due to end; he heard quiet footsteps he recognized。 It was Zedd; a piece of cheese in each hand; with no cloak; wearing only his simple robes。
 
 〃What are you doing up? It's not time for your watch yet。〃
 
 〃I thought you might like the pany of a friend。 Here; I brought you a piece of cheese。〃
 
 〃No; thanks。 About the cheese; I mean。 I could use the friend part; though。〃
 
 Zedd sat down next to him; folded his bony knees up to his chest; and pulled the robes down over them; making himself the center of a little tent。 〃What's the problem?〃 Richard shrugged。 〃Kahlan; I guess。〃 Zedd didn't say anything。 Richard looked over。 〃She's the first thing in my mind when I wake and the last thing in my mind before I sleep。 I've never felt like this before; Zedd; never felt this alone before。〃
 
 〃I see。〃 Zedd laid the cheese on a rock。
 
 〃I know she likes me; but I get the feeling she's keeping me at arm's length。 When we were setting up camp tonight; I told her that if it had been her; like Chase today; I would have e after her。 A while ago she came out here to see me。 She said she didn't want me ing after her; but she meant more than that。 She meant she didn't want me ing after her; period。〃
 
 〃Good girl;〃 Zedd said under his breath。
 
 〃What?? 。
 
 〃I said she's a good girl。 We all like her。 But Richard; she is other things; too。 She has responsibilities。〃
 
 Richard frowned at the old man。 〃And what are those other things?〃
 
 Zedd leaned back a little。 〃It's not for me to say。 She is the one to answer that。 I would have thought she would have done so by now。〃 The old man put his arm around Richard's big shoulders。 〃If it makes you feel any better; the only reason she hasn't is because she cares for you more than she should。 She is afraid of losing your friendship。〃
 
 〃You know about her secrets; and Chase knows; I can see it in his eyes。 Everyone knows but me。 She tried to tell me tonight;。 but she couldn't。 She shouldn't worry about losing my friendship。 That won't happen。〃
 
 〃Richard; she is a wonderful person; but she is not the one for you。 She can't be that。〃
 
 〃Why?〃
 
 Zedd plucked something off his sleeve as he spoke; avoiding Richard's eyes。 〃I gave my word I would allow her to be the one to tell you。 You will just have to trust me; she cannot be what you want。 Find another girl。 The land is awash with them。 Why; half of all the people are girls; there are plenty to pick from。 Pick another。〃
 
 Richard drew his knees up; folding his arms across them; looking away。 〃All right。〃 Zedd looked up in surprise; then smiled and patted his young friend's back。
 
 〃All right on one condition;〃 Richard added as he scanned the boundary woods。 〃You answer one question; honestly; toasted toads honest。 If you can answer yes; then I will do as you ask。〃
 
 〃One? Only one question?〃 Zedd asked cautiously; putting a bony finger to his thin bottom lip。 。
 
 〃One question。〃
 
 Zedd thought about it a minute。 〃Very well。 One question。〃
 
 Richard turned his fierce eyes to the old man。 〃Before you married your wife; if someone…tell you what; let's make it even easier for you to say yes…if someone you trusted; a friend; someone you loved like a father; if that person had e to you; and said pick another; would you have done so?〃
 
 Zedd looked away from Richard's eyes and took a deep breath。 〃Bags。 You would think by now I would have learned not to let a Seeker ask me a question。〃 He picked up the cheese and took a bite。
 
 〃I thought as much。〃
 
 Zedd threw the cheese away into the darkness。 〃That doesn't change the facts; Richard! It will not work between you two。 I'm not saying this to hurt you。 I love you like a son。 If I could change the way the world works; I would。 I wish it were not so; for your sake; but there is no way for it to work。 Kahlan knows it; and if you try; you will only hurt her。 I know you don't want that。〃
 
 Richard's voice was calm; quiet。 〃You said it yourself。 I am the Seeker。 There is a way; and I will find it。〃
 
 Zedd shook his head sadly。 〃I wish it were so; my boy; but it is not。〃
 
 〃Then what am I to do?〃 Richard asked in a broken whisper。
 
 His old friend put his skinny arms around him and hugged him close in the darkness。 Richard felt numb。
 
 〃Just be her friend; Richard。 That's what she needs。 But you can be nothing more。〃
 
 Richard nodded in Zedd's arms。
 
 After a few minutes the Seeker; a suspicious look in his eye; pushed away; holding the wizard at arm's length。
 
 〃What is it you came out here for?〃 〃To sit with a friend。〃
 
 Richard shook his head。 〃You came out here as wizard; away from the others; to counsel the Seeker。 Now; tell me why you're here。〃
 
 〃Very well。 I came here in my capacity as wizard; to tell the Seeker he almost made a serious mistake today。〃
 
 Richard took his hands from Zedd's shoulders; but continued to hold his gaze。 〃I know that。 A Seeker cannot put himself at risk when by so doing he puts everyone else at risk。〃
 
 〃But you were going to do it anyway;〃 Zedd pressed。
 
 〃When you named me Seeker; you took the bad with the good。 I'm new at the responsibilities of the position。 It's hard for me to see a friend in trouble and not help。 I know I can't afford that luxury anymore。 Consider me reprimanded。〃
 
 Zedd smiled。 〃Well; that part went well。〃 He sat a minute; his smile faded。 〃But Richard; the issue is bigger than just what happened today。 You must understand that; as Seeker; you may cause the death of innocent people。 In order to succeed in stopping Rahl you may have to turn away from those who might be saved with your help。 A soldier knows that on the battlefield; if he bends to help a downed rade; he might take a sword in the back; and so; if he is to win; he must fight on despite the cries for help from his fellows。 You must be able to do this to win; it may be the only way。 You must steel yourself to it。 This is a struggle for survival; and in this battle the ones crying for help probably won't be soldiers; but innocents。 Darken Rahl will kill anyone to win。 Those who fight on his side will do the same。 You may have to do the same。 Like it or not; the aggressor makes the rules。 You must play by them; or you will surely die by them。〃
 
 〃How could anyone fight on his side? Darken Rahl wants to dominate everyone; to be the master of all。 How could they fight for him?〃
 
 The wizard leaned back against the rock and looked out over the hills; as if seeing more than was there。 His tone was sorrowful。 〃Because; Richard; many people must be ruled to thrive。 In their selfishness and greed; they see free people as their oppressors。 They wish to have a leader who will cut the taller plants so the sun will reach them。 They think no plant should be allowed to grow taller than the shortest; and in that way g
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