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slop…over anywhere。 So that to feel as she did was almost horrible
to Barbara。 Yet she could not get rid of the sensation。 With sudden
recklessness she tried giving herself up to it entirely。 Undoing the
scarf at her throat； she let the air play on her bared neck； and
stretched out her arms as if to hug the wind to her； then； with a
sigh； she got up； and walked on。 And now she began thinking of
'Anonyma'； turning her position over and over。 The idea that anyone
young and beautiful should thus be clipped off in her life； roused
her impatient indignation。 Let them try it with her！ They would
soon see！ For all her cultivated 'hardness；' Barbara really hated
anything to suffer。 It seemed to her unnatural。 She never went to
that hospital where Lady Valleys had a ward； nor to their summer camp
for crippled children； nor to help in their annual concert for
sweated workers； without a feeling of such vehement pity that it was
like being seized by the throat： Once； when she had been singing to
them； the rows of wan； pinched faces below had been too much for her；
she had broken down； forgotten her words； lost memory of the tune；
and just ended her performance with a smile； worth more perhaps to
her audience than those lost verses。 She never came away from such
sights and places without a feeling of revolt amounting almost to
rage； and she only continued to go because she dimly knew that it was
expected of her not to turn her back on such things； in her section
of Society。
But it was not this feeling which made her stop before Mrs。 Noel's
cottage； nor was it curiosity。 It was a quite simple desire to
squeeze her hand。
'Anonyma' seemed taking her trouble as only those women who are no
good at self…assertion can take thingsdoing exactly as she would
have done if nothing had happened； a little paler than usual； with
lips pressed rather tightly together。
They neither of them spoke at first； but stood looking； not at each
other's faces； but at each other's breasts。 At last Barbara stepped
forward impulsively and kissed her。
After that； like two children who kiss first； and then make
acquaintance； they stood apart； silent； faintly smiling。 It had been
given and returned in real sweetness and comradeship； that kiss； for
a sign of womanhood making face against the world； but now that it
was over； both felt a little awkward。 Would that kiss have been
given if Fate had been auspicious？ Was it not proof of misery？ So
Mrs。 Noel's smile seemed saying； and Barbara's smile unwillingly
admitted。 Perceiving that if they talked it could only be about the
most ordinary things； they began speaking of music； flowers； and the
queerness of bees' legs。 But all the time； Barbara； though seemingly
unconscious； was noting with her smiling eyes； the tiny movement's；
by which one woman can tell what is passing in another。 She saw a
little quiver tighten the corner of the lips； the eyes suddenly grow
large and dark； the thin blouse desperately rise and fall。 And her
fancy； quickened by last night's memory； saw this woman giving
herself up to the memory of love in her thoughts。 At this sight she
felt a little of that impatience which the conquering feel for the
passive； and perhaps just a touch of jealousy。
Whatever Miltoun decided； that would this woman accept！ Such
resignation； while it simplified things； offended the part of Barbara
which rebelled against all inaction； all dictation； even from her
favourite brother。 She said suddenly：
〃Are you going to do nothing？ Aren't you going to try and free
yourself？ If I were in your position； I would never rest till I'd
made them free me。〃
But Mrs。 Noel did not answer； and sweeping her glance from that crown
of soft dark hair； down the soft white figure； to the very feet；
Barbara cried：
〃I believe you are a fatalist。〃
Soon after that； not knowing what more to say； she went away。 But
walking home across the fields； where full summer was swinging on the
delicious air and there was now no bull but only red cows to crop
short the 'milk…maids' and buttercups； she suffered from this strange
revelation of the strength of softness and passivityas though she
had seen in the white figure of 'Anonyma；' and heard in her voice
something from beyond； symbolic； inconceivable； yet real。
CHAPTER XVIII
Lord Valleys； relieved from official pressure by subsidence of the
war scare； had returned for a long week…end。 To say that he had been
intensely relieved by the news that Mrs。 Noel was not free； would be
to put it mildly。 Though not old…fashioned； like his mother…in…law；
in regard to the mixing of the castes； prepared to admit that
exclusiveness was out of date； to pass over with a shrug and a laugh
those numerous alliances by which his order were renewing the sinews
of war； and indeed in his capacity of an expert； often pointing out
the dangers of too much in…breedingyet he had a peculiar personal
feeling about his own family； and was perhaps a little extra
sensitive because of Agatha； for Shropton； though a good fellow； and
extremely wealthy； was only a third baronet； and had originally been
made of iron。 It was inadvisable to go outside the inner circle
where there was no material necessity for so doing。 He had not done
it himself。 Moreover there was a sentiment about these things！
On the morning after his arrival； visiting the kennels before
breakfast； he stood chatting with his head man； and caressing the wet
noses of his two favourite pointers；with something of the feeling
of a boy let out of school。 Those pleasant creatures； cowering and
quivering with pride against his legs； and turning up at him their
yellow Chinese eyes； gave him that sense of warmth and comfort which
visits men in the presence of their hobbies。 With this particular
pair； inbred to the uttermost； he had successfully surmounted a great
risk。 It was now touch and go whether he dared venture on one more
cross to the original strain； in the hope of eliminating the last
clinging of liver colour。 It was a gambleand it was just that
which rendered it so vastly interesting。
A small voice diverted his attention； he looked round and saw little
Ann。 She had been in bed when he arrived the night before； and he
was therefore the newest thing about。
She carried in her arms a guinea…pig； and began at once：
〃Grandpapa； Granny wants you。 She's on the terrace； she's talking to
Mr。 Courtier。 I like himhe's a kind man。 If I put my guinea…pig
down； will they bite it？ Poor darlingthey shan't！ Isn't it a
darling！〃
Lord Valleys； twirling his moustache； regarded the guinea…pig without
favour； he had rather a dislike for all senseless kinds of beasts。
Pressing the guinea…pig between her hands； as it might be a
concertina； little Ann jigged it gently above the pointers； who；
wrinkling horribly their long noses； gazed upwards； fascinated。
〃Poor darlings； they want itdon't they？ Grandpapa〃
〃Yes。〃
〃Do you think the next puppies will be spotted quite all over？〃
Continuing to twirl his moustache； Lord Valleys answered：
〃I think it is not improbable； Ann。〃
〃Why do you like them spotted like that？