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the lost road-第8章

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from the tropics a welcome homecoming。

Instead of returning at once to his club; he slackened his steps。
The shop windows of Sixth Avenue hung with Christmas garlands;
and colored lamps glowed like open fireplaces。  Lee passed slowly
before them; glad that he had been able to get back at such a
season。  For the moment he had forgotten the woman he sought; and
was conscious only of his surroundings。  He had paused in front of
the window of a pawn…shop。  Over the array of cheap jewelry; of
banjos; shot…guns; and razors; his eyes moved idly。  And then they
became transfixed and staring。  In the very front of the window;
directly under his nose; was a tarnished silver loving…cup。  On it
was engraved; 〃Mixed Doubles。 Agawamsett; 1910。〃  In all the world
there were only two such cups; and as though he were dodging the
slash of a bolo; Lee leaped into the shop。  Many precious seconds
were wasted in persuading Mrs。 Cohen that he did not believe the
cup had been stolen; that he was not from the Central Office;
that he believed the lady who had pawned the cup had come by it
honestly; that he meant no harm to the lady; that he meant no
harm to Mrs。 Cohen; that; much as the young lady may have needed
the money Mrs。 Cohen had loaned her on the cup; he needed the
address of the young lady still more。

Mrs。 Cohen retired behind a screen; and Lee was conscious that
from the other side of it the whole family of Cohens were taking
his measurements。  He approved of their efforts to protect the
owner of the cup; but not from him。

He offered; if one of the younger Cohens would take him to the
young lady; to let him first ask her if she would receive Captain Lee;
and for his service he would give the young Cohen untold gold。
He exhibited the untold gold。  The young Cohen choked at the sight
and sprang into the seat beside the driver of a taxicab。

〃To the Working Girls' Home; on Tenth Street!〃 he commanded。


Through the falling snow and the flashing lights they slid;
skidded; and leaped。  Inside the cab Lee shivered with excitement;
with cold; with fear that it might not be true。  He could not
realize she was near。  It was easier to imagine himself still in
the jungle; with months of time and sixteen thousand miles of
land and water separating them; or in the hospital; on a
white…enamel cot; watching the shadow creep across the
whitewashed wall; or lying beneath an awning that did not move;
staring at a burning; brazen sea that did not move; on a transport
that; timed by the beating of his heart; stood still。

Those days were within the radius of his experience。  Separation;
absence; the immutable giants of time and space; he knew。  With
them he had fought and could withstand them。  But to be near her;
to hear her voice; to bring his love into her actual presence; that was
an attack upon his feelings which found him without weapons。  That
for a very few dollars she had traded the cup from which she had sworn
never to part did not concern him。  Having parted from him; what she
did with a silver mug was of little consequence。  It was of significance
only in that it meant she was poor。  And that she was either an inmate
or a matron of a lodging…house for working girls also showed she was
poor。

He had been told that was her condition; and that she was in ill health;
and that from all who loved her she had refused to accept help。  At the
thought his jaws locked pugnaciously。  There was one who loved her;
who; should she refuse his aid; was prepared to make her life intolerable。
He planned in succession at lightning speed all he might do for her。  Among
other things he would make this Christmas the happiest she or he would
ever know。  Not for an instant did he question that she who had refused
help from all who loved her could refuse anything he offered。  For he
knew it was offered with a love that demanded nothing in return; with
a love that asked only to be allowed to love; and to serve。  To refuse help
inspired by such a feeling as his would be morbid; wicked; ridiculous;
as though a flower refused to turn its face to the sun; and shut its lips
to the dew。

The cab stopped in front of a brick building adorned with many fire…
escapes。  Afterward he remembered a bare; brilliantly lit hall hung with
photographs of the Acropolis; and a stout; capable woman in a cap; who
looked him over and said:

〃You will find Mrs。 Stedman in the writing…room。〃

And he remembered entering a room filled with Mission furniture and
reading…lamps under green shades。  It was empty; except for a young
girl in deep black; who was seated facing him; her head bent above a
writing…desk。  As he came into the circle of the lamps the girl raised
her eyes and as though lifted to her feet by what she saw; and through
no effort of her own; stood erect。

And the young man who had persuaded himself his love demanded
nothing; who asked only to worship at her gate; found his arms reaching
out; and heard his voice as though it came from a great distance; cry;
〃Frances!〃

And the girl who had refused the help of all who loved her; like a
homing pigeon walked straight into the outstretched arms。

After five minutes; when he was almost able to believe it was true;
he said in his commanding; masterful way: 〃And now I'm going to
take you out of here。  I'm going to buy you a ring; and a sable coat;
and a house to live in; and a dinner。  Which shall we buy first?〃

〃First;〃 said Frances; frowning happily; 〃I am afraid we must go
to the Ritz; to tell Aunt Emily。  She always loved you; and it will
make her so happy。〃

〃To the Ritz!〃 stammered the young man。  〃To Aunt Emily! I thought
they told me your aunt and…you…〃

〃We quarrelled; yes;〃 said Frances; 〃and she has forgiven me; but she
has not forgiven herself; so she spoils me; and already I have a house
to live in; and several sable coats; and; oh! everything; everything but
the ring。〃

〃I am so sorry!〃 cried Lee。  〃I thought you were poor。  I hoped you were
poor。  But you are joking!〃 he exclaimed delightedly。  〃You are here in
a working girls' home…〃

〃It is one of Aunt Emily's charities。  She built it;〃 said Frances。  〃I
come here to talk to the girls。〃

〃But;〃 persisted Lee triumphantly; 〃if you are not poor; why did you
pawn our silver loving…cup?〃

The face of the girl became a lovely crimson; and tears rose to her eyes。
As though at a confessional; she lifted her hands penitently。

〃Try to understand;〃 she begged; 〃I wanted you to love me; not for
my money…〃

〃But you knew!〃 cried Lee。

〃I had to be sure;〃 begged the girl; 〃and I wanted to believe you loved
me even if I did not love you。  When it was too late I knew you loved me
as no woman ever deserved to be loved; and I wanted that love。  I could
not live without it。  So when I read in the papers you had returned I
wouldn't let myself write you; I wouldn't let myself beg you to come
to see me。  I set a test for you。  I knew from the papers you were at the
Army and Navy Club; and that around the corner was the recruiting
office。  I'd often seen the sergeant there; in uniform; at the door。  I knew
you must pass from your club to the office many times eac
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