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have been better if I hadn't given my company so much scope。 I
wonder what they've been doing。 I think I will curtail their
discretion； though none of them appear to have much of the
article。 It seems a pity to deprive 'em of what little they
have。
＇Enter Daphne； weeping＇
THES。 Now then； Daphne； what's the matter with you？
DAPH。 Well； you know how disgracefully Sparkeion
THES。 ＇correcting her＇ Apollo
DAPH。 Apollo； thenhas treated me。 He promised to marry me years
ago and now he's married to Nicemis。
THES。 Now look here。 I can't go into that。 You're in Olympus now
and must behave accordingly。 Drop your Daphneassume your
Calliope。
DAPH。 Quite so。 That's it。 ＇mysteriously＇
THES。 Ohthat is it？ ＇puzzled＇
DAPH。 That is it。 Thespis。 I am Calliope； the muse of fame。
Very good。 This morning I was in the Olympian library and I took
down the only book there。 Here it is。
THES。 ＇taking it＇ Lempriere's Classical Dictionary。 The Olympian
Peerage。
DAPH。 Open it at Apollo。
THES。 ＇opens it＇ It is done。
DAPH。 Read。
THES。 〃Apollo was several times married； among others to Issa；
Bolina； Coronis； Chymene； Cyrene； Chione； Acacallis； and
Calliope。〃
DAPH。 And Calliope。
THES。 ＇musing＇ Ha。 I didn't know he was married to them。
DAPH。 ＇severely＇ Sir。 This is the family edition。
THES。 Quite so。
DAPH。 You couldn't expect a lady to read any other？
THES。 On no consideration。 But in the original version
DAPH。 I go by the family edition。
THES。 Then by the family edition； Apollo is your husband。
＇Enter Nicemis and Sparkeion＇
NICE。 Apollo your husband？ He is my husband。
DAPH。 I beg your pardon。 He is my husband。
NICE。 Apollo is Sparkeion； and he's married to me。
DAPH。 Sparkeion is Apollo； and he's married to me。
NICE。 He is my husband。
DAPH。 He's your brother。
THES。 Look here； Apollo； whose husband are you？ Don't let's have
any row about it； whose husband are you？
SPAR。 Upon my honor I don't know。 I'm in a very delicate
position； but I'll fall in with any arrangement Thespis may
propose。
DAPH。 I've just found out that he's my husband and yet he goes
out every evening with that 〃thing。〃
THES。 Perhaps he's trying an experiment。
DAPH。 I don't like my husband to make such experiments。 The
question is； who are we all and what is our relation to each
other。
SPAR。 You're Diana。 I'm Apollo
And Calliope is she。
DAPH。 He's your brother。
NICE。 You're another。 He has fairly married me。
DAPH。 By the rules of this fair spot
I'm his wife and you are not。
SPAR & DAPH。 By the rules of this fair spot
I'm/she's his wife and you are not。
NICE。 By this golden wedding ring；
I'm his wife； and you're a 〃thing。〃
DAPH； NICE； SPAR。 By this golden wedding ring；
I'm/She's his wife and you're a 〃thing。〃
ALL。 Please will someone kindly tell us。
Who are our respective kin？
All of us/them are very jealous
Neither of us/them will give in。
NICE。 He's my husband； I declare；
I espoused him properlee。
SPAR。 That is true； for I was there；
And I saw her marry me。
DAPH。 He's your brotherI'm his wife。
If we go by Lempriere。
SPAR。 So she is； upon my life。
Really； that seems very fair。
NICE。 You're my husband and no other。
SPAR。 That is true enough I swear。
DAPH。 I'm his wife； and you're his brother。
SPAR。 If we go by Lempriere。
NICE。 It will surely be unfair；
To decide by Lempriere。 ＇crying＇
DAPH。 It will surely be quite fair；
To decide by Lempriere。
SPAR & THES How you settle it I don't care；
Leave it all to Lempriere。
＇Spoken＇ The Verdict
As Sparkeion is Apollo；
Up in this Olympian clime；
Why； Nicemis； it will follow；
He's her husband； for the time。 ＇indicating Daphne＇
When Sparkeion turns to mortal
Join once more the sons of men。
He may take you to his portal ＇indicating Nicemis＇
He will be your husband then。
That oh that is my decision；
'Cording to my mental vision；
Put an end to all collision；
My decision； my decision。
ALL。 That oh that is his decision。 etc。
＇Exeunt Thes； Nice。； Spar and Daphne； Spar。 with Daphne； Nicemis
weeping with Thespis。 mysterious music。 Enter Jupiter； Apollo
and Mars from below； at the back of stage。 All wear cloaks； as
disguise and all are masked＇
JUP。； AP。； MARS。 Oh rage and fury； Oh shame and sorrow。
We'll be resuming our ranks tomorrow。
Since from Olympus we have departed；
We've been distracted and brokenhearted；
Oh wicked Thespis。 Oh villain scurvy。
Through him Olympus is topsy turvy。
Compelled to silence to grin and bear it。
He's caused our sorrow； and he shall share it。
Where is the monster。 Avenge his blunders。
He has awakened Olympian thunders。
＇Enter Mercury＇
JUP。 Oh monster。
AP。 Oh monster。
MARS。 Oh monster。
MER。 ＇in great terror＇ Please sir； what have I done； sir？
JUP。 What did we leave you behind for？
MER。 Please sir； that's the question I asked for when you went
away。
JUP。 Was it not that Thespis might consult you whenever he was in
a difficulty？
MER。 Well； here I've been ready to be consulted； chockful of
reliable informationrunning over with celestial maximsadvice
gratis ten to fourafter twelve ring the night bell in cases of
emergency。
JUP。 And hasn't he consulted you？
MER。 Not hehe disagrees with me about everything。
JUP。 He must have misunderstood me。 I told him to consult you
whenever he was in a fix。
MER。 He must have though you said in…sult。 Why whenever I opened
my mouth he jumps down my throat。 It isn't pleasant to have a
fellow constantly jumping down your throatespecially when he
always disagrees with you。 It's just the sort of thing I can't
digest。
JUP。 ＇in a rage＇ Send him here。 I'll talk to him。
＇enter Thespis。 He is much terrified＇
JUP。 Oh monster。
AP。 Oh monster。
MARS。 Oh monster。
＇Thespis sings in great terror； which he endeavours to conceal＇
JUP。 Well sir； the year is up today。
AP。 And a nice mess you've made of it。
MARS。 You've deranged the whole scheme of society。
THES。 ＇aside＇ There's going to be a row。 ＇aloud and very
familiarly＇My dear boy； I do assure you
JUP。 Be respectful。
AP。 Be respectful。
MARS。 Be respectful。
THES。 I don't know what you allude to。 With the exception of
getting our scene painter to 〃run up〃 this temple； because we
found the ruins draughty； we haven't touched a thing。
JUP。 Oh story teller。
AP。 Oh story teller。
MARS。 Oh story teller。
＇Enter thespians＇
THES。 My dear fellows； you're distressing yourselves
unne