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THE HISTORY OF TROILUS AND CRESSIDA
Achilles； were his brain as barren As banks of Libya…though； Apollo
knows； 'Tis dry enough…will with great speed of judgment； Ay； with
celerity； find Hector's purpose Pointing on him。 ULYSSES。 And wake him
to the answer； think you？ NESTOR。 Why； 'tis most meet。 Who may you
else oppose That can from Hector bring those honours off； If not Achilles？
Though 't be a sportful combat； Yet in this trial much opinion dwells； For
here the Troyans taste our dear'st repute With their fin'st palate； and trust
to me； Ulysses； Our imputation shall be oddly pois'd In this vile action； for
the success； Although particular； shall give a scantling Of good or bad
unto the general； And in such indexes； although small pricks To their
subsequent volumes； there is seen The baby figure of the giant mas Of
things to come at large。 It is suppos'd He that meets Hector issues from our
choice； And choice； being mutual act of all our souls； Makes merit her
election； and doth boil； As 'twere from forth us all； a man distill'd Out of
our virtues； who miscarrying； What heart receives from hence a
conquering part； To steel a strong opinion to themselves？ Which
entertain'd； limbs are his instruments； In no less working than are swords
and bows Directive by the limbs。 ULYSSES。 Give pardon to my speech。
Therefore 'tis meet Achilles meet not Hector。 Let us； like merchants； show
our foulest wares And think perchance they'll sell； if not； the lustre Of the
better yet to show shall show the better； By showing the worst first。 Do not
consent That ever Hector and Achilles meet； For both our honour and our
shame in this Are dogg'd with two strange followers。 NESTOR。 I see them
not with my old eyes。 What are they？ ULYSSES。 What glory our Achilles
shares from Hector； Were he not proud； we all should wear with him； But
he already is too insolent； And it were better parch in Afric sun Than in the
pride and salt scorn of his eyes； Should he scape Hector fair。 If he were
foil'd； Why； then we do our main opinion crush In taint of our best man。
No； make a lott'ry； And； by device； let blockish Ajax draw The sort to fight
with Hector。 Among ourselves Give him allowance for the better man； For
that will physic the great Myrmidon； Who broils in loud applause； and
make him fall His crest； that prouder than blue Iris bends。 If the dull
brainless Ajax come safe off； We'll dress him up in voices； if he fail； Yet
go we under our opinion still That we have better men。 But； hit or miss；
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THE HISTORY OF TROILUS AND CRESSIDA
Our project's life this shape of sense assumes… Ajax employ'd plucks down
Achilles' plumes。 NESTOR。 Now； Ulysses； I begin to relish thy advice；
And I will give a taste thereof forthwith To Agamemnon。 Go we to him
straight。 Two curs shall tame each other： pride alone Must tarre the
mastiffs on； as 'twere their bone。 Exeunt
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THE HISTORY OF TROILUS AND CRESSIDA
ACT II。
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THE HISTORY OF TROILUS AND CRESSIDA
SCENE 1。 The Grecian camp
Enter Ajax and THERSITES
AJAX。 Thersites！ THERSITES。 Agamemnon…how if he had boils full；
an over； generally？ AJAX。 Thersites！ THERSITES。 And those boils did
run…say so。 Did not the general run then？ Were not that a botchy core？
AJAX。 Dog！ THERSITES。 Then there would come some matter from him；
I see none now。 AJAX。 Thou bitch…wolf's son； canst thou not hear？ Feel；
then。 ＇Strikes him。＇ THERSITES。 The plague of Greece upon thee； thou
mongrel beef…witted lord！ AJAX。 Speak； then； thou whinid'st leaven；
speak。 I will beat thee into handsomeness。 THERSITES。 I shall sooner rail
thee into wit and holiness； but I think thy horse will sooner con an oration
than thou learn a prayer without book。 Thou canst strike； canst thou？ A red
murrain o' thy jade's tricks！ AJAX。 Toadstool； learn me the proclamation。
THERSITES。 Dost thou think I have no sense； thou strikest me thus？
AJAX。 The proclamation！ THERSITES。 Thou art proclaim'd； a fool； I
think。 AJAX。 Do not； porpentine； do not； my fingers itch。 THERSITES。 I
would thou didst itch from head to foot and I had the scratching of thee； I
would make thee the loathsomest scab in Greece。 When thou art forth in
the incursions； thou strikest as slow as another。 AJAX。 I say； the
proclamation。 THERSITES。 Thou grumblest and railest every hour on
Achilles； and thou art as full of envy at his greatness as Cerberus is at
Proserpina's beauty…ay； that thou bark'st at him。 AJAX。 Mistress Thersites！
THERSITES。 Thou shouldst strike him。 AJAX。 Cobloaf！ THERSITES。 He
would pun thee into shivers with his fist； as a sailor breaks a biscuit。 AJAX。
You whoreson cur！ ＇Strikes him＇ THERSITES。 Do； do。 AJAX。 Thou stool
for a witch！ THERSITES。 Ay； do； do； thou sodden…witted lord！ Thou hast
no more brain than I have in mine elbows； an assinico may tutor thee。 You
scurvy valiant ass！ Thou art here but to thrash Troyans； and thou art
bought and sold among those of any wit like a barbarian slave。 If thou use
to beat me； I will begin at thy heel and tell what thou art by inches； thou
thing of no bowels； thou！ AJAX。 You dog！ THERSITES。 You scurvy lord！
AJAX。 You cur！ ＇Strikes him＇ THERSITES。 Mars his idiot！ Do； rudeness；
do； camel； do； do。
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THE HISTORY OF TROILUS AND CRESSIDA
Enter ACHILLES and PATROCLUS