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family？〃
〃Let me see；〃 Henry Wimbush rubbed his chin thoughtfully。 〃I can
only think of two suicides； one violent death； four or perhaps five broken
hearts； and half a dozen little blots on the scutcheon in the way of
misalliances； seductions； natural children； and the like。 No； on the whole；
it's a placid and uneventful record。〃
〃The Wimbushes and the Lapiths were always an unadventurous；
respectable crew；〃 said Priscilla； with a note of scorn in her voice。 〃If I
were to write my family history now！ Why； it would be one long
continuous blot from beginning to end。〃 She laughed jovially； and
helped herself to another glass of wine。
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〃If I were to write mine；〃 Mr。 Scogan remarked； 〃it wouldn't exist。
After the second generation we Scogans are lost in the mists of antiquity。〃
〃After dinner；〃 said Henry Wimbush； a little piqued by his wife's
disparaging comment on the masters of Crome； 〃I'll read you an episode
from my History that will make you admit that even the Lapiths； in their
own respectable way； had their tragedies and strange adventures。〃
〃I'm glad to hear it；〃 said Priscilla。
〃Glad to hear what？〃 asked Jenny； emerging suddenly from her private
interior world like a cuckoo from a clock。 She received an explanation；
smiled； nodded； cuckooed at last 〃I see；〃 and popped back； clapping shut
the door behind her。
Dinner was eaten； the party had adjourned to the drawing…room。
〃Now；〃 said Henry Wimbush； pulling up a chair to the lamp。 He put
on his round pince…nez； rimmed with tortoise…shell； and began cautiously
to turn over the pages of his loose and still fragmentary book。 He found
his place at last。 〃Shall I begin？〃 he asked； looking up。
〃Do；〃 said Priscilla； yawning。
In the midst of an attentive silence Mr。 Wimbush gave a little
preliminary cough and started to read。
〃The infant who was destined to become the fourth baronet of the
name of Lapith was born in the year 1740。 He was a very small baby；
weighing not more than three pounds at birth； but from the first he was
sturdy and healthy。 In honour of his maternal grandfather； Sir Hercules
Occam of Bishop's Occam； he was christened Hercules。 His mother； like
many other mothers； kept a notebook； in which his progress from month to
month was recorded。 He walked at ten months； and before his second year
was out he had learnt to speak a number of words。 At three years he
weighed but twenty…four pounds； and at six； though he could read and
write perfectly and showed a remarkable aptitude for music； he was no
larger and heavier than a well…grown child of two。 Meanwhile； his mother
had borne two other children； a boy and a girl； one of whom died of croup
during infancy； while the other was carried off by smallpox before it
reached the age of five。 Hercules remained the only surviving child。
〃On his twelfth birthday Hercules was still only three feet and two
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inches in height。 His head； which was very handsome and nobly shaped；
was too big for his body； but otherwise he was exquisitely proportioned；
and； for his size； of great strength and agility。 His parents； in the hope of
making him grow； consulted all the most eminent physicians of the time。
Their various prescriptions were followed to the letter； but in vain。 One
ordered a very plentiful meat diet； another exercise； a third constructed a
little rack； modelled on those employed by the Holy Inquisition； on which
young Hercules was stretched； with excruciating torments； for half an hour
every morning and evening。 In the course of the next three years
Hercules gained perhaps two inches。 After that his growth stopped
completely； and he remained for the rest of his life a pigmy of three feet
and four inches。 His father； who had built the most extravagant hopes
upon his son； planning for him in his imagination a military career equal to
that of Marlborough； found himself a disappointed man。 'I have brought
an abortion into the world；' he would say； and he took so violent a dislike
to his son that the boy dared scarcely come into his presence。 His temper；
which had been serene； was turned by disappointment to moroseness and
savagery。 He avoided all company （being； as he said； ashamed to show
himself； the father of a lusus naturae； among normal； healthy human
beings）； and took to solitary drinking； which carried him very rapidly to
his grave； for the year before Hercules came of age his father was taken
off by an apoplexy。 His mother； whose love for him had increased with the
growth of his father's unkindness； did not long survive； but little more than
a year after her husband's death succumbed； after eating two dozen of
oysters； to an attack of typhoid fever。
〃Hercules thus found himself at the age of twenty…one alone in the
world； and master of a considerable fortune； including the estate and
mansion of Crome。 The beauty and intelligence of his childhood had
survived into his manly age； and； but for his dwarfish stature； he would
have taken his place among the handsomest and most accomplished young
men of his time。 He was well read in the Greek and Latin authors； as
well as in all the moderns of any merit who had written in English； French；
or Italian。 He had a good ear for music； and was no indifferent performer
on the violin； which he used to play like a bass viol； seated on a chair with
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the instrument between his legs。 To the music of the harpsichord and
clavichord he was extremely partial； but the smallness of his hands made it
impossible for him ever to perform upon these instruments。 He had a
small ivory flute made for him； on which； whenever he was melancholy；
he used to play a simple country air or jig； affirming that this rustic music