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this really； that I did not really want to crush； to subdue； to
attract them； and that I did not care a straw really for the
result； even if I did achieve it。 Oh； how I prayed for the day
to pass quickly！ In unutterable anguish I went to the window；
opened the movable pane and looked out into the troubled darkness
of the thickly falling wet snow。 At last my wretched little
clock hissed out five。 I seized my hat and； trying not to look
at Apollon； who had been all day expecting his month's wages； but
in his foolishness was unwilling to be the first to speak about
it； I slipped between him and the door and； lumping into a
high…class sledge； on which I spent my last half rouble； I drove
up in grand style to the Hotel de Paris。
IV
I had been certain the day before that I should be the first to
arrive。 But it was not a question of being the first to arrive。
Not only were they not there； but I had difficulty in finding our
room。 The table was not laid even。 What did it mean？ After a
good many questions I elicited from the waiters that the dinner
had been ordered not for five； but for six o'clock。 This was
confirmed at the buffet too。 I felt really ashamed to go on
questioning them。 It was only twenty…five minutes past five。 If
they changed the dinner hour they ought at least to have let me
knowthat is what the post is for； and not to have put me in an
absurd position in my own eyes and。。。and even before the waiters。
I sat down； the servant began laying the table； I felt even more
humiliated when he was present。 Towards six o'clock they brought
in candles； though there were lamps burning in the room。 It had
not occurred to the waiter； however； to bring them in at once
when I arrived。 In the next room two gloomy； angry…looking
persons were eating their dinners in silence at two different
tables。 There was a great deal of noise； even shouting； in a
room further away； one could hear the laughter of a crowd of
people； and nasty little shrieks in French： there were ladies at
the dinner。 It was sickening； in fact。 I rarely passed more
unpleasant moments； so much so that when they did arrive all
together punctually at six I was overjoyed to see them； as though
they were my deliverers； and even forgot that it was incumbent
upon me to show resentment。
Zverkov walked in at the head of them； evidently he was the
leading spirit。 He and all of them were laughing； but； seeing
me； Zverkov drew himself up a little； walked up to me
deliberately with a slight； rather jaunty bend from the waist。
He shook hands with me in a friendly； but not over…friendly；
fashion； with a sort of circumspect courtesy like that of a
General； as though in giving me his hand he were warding off
something。 I had imagined； on the contrary； that on coming in he
would at once break into his habitual thin； shrill laugh and fall
to making his insipid jokes and witticisms。 I had been preparing
for them ever since the previous day； but I had not expected such
condescension； such high…official courtesy。 So； then； he felt
himself ineffably superior to me in every respect！ If he only
meant to insult me by that high…official tone； it would not
matter； I thoughtI could pay him back for it one way or
another。 But what if； in reality； without the least desire to be
offensive； that sheepshead had a notion in earnest that he was
superior to me and could only look at me in a patronising way？
The very supposition made me gasp。
〃I was surprised to hear of your desire to join us；〃 he began；
lisping and drawling； which was something new。 〃You and I seem
to have seen nothing of one another。 You shy away from us。 You
shouldn't。 We are not such terrible people as you think。 Well；
anyway； I am glad to renew our acquaintance。〃
And he turned carelessly to put down his hat on the window。
〃Have you been waiting long？〃 Trudolyubov inquired。
〃I arrived at five o'clock as you told me yesterday；〃 I answered
aloud； with an irritability that threatened an explosion。
〃Didn't you let him know that we had changed the hour？〃 said
Trudolyubov to Simonov。
〃No； I didn't。 I forgot；〃 the latter replied； with no sign of
regret； and without even apologising to me he went off to order
the hors d'oeuvre。
〃So you've been here a whole hour？ Oh； poor fellow！〃 Zverkov
cried ironically； for to his notions this was bound to be
extremely funny。 That rascal Ferfitchkin followed with his nasty
little snigger like a puppy yapping。 My position struck him；
too； as exquisitely ludicrous and embarrassing。
〃It isn't funny at all！〃 I cried to Ferfitchkin； more and more
irritated。 〃It wasn't my fault； but other people's。 They
neglected to let me know。 It was。。。it was。。。it was simply
absurd。〃
〃It's not only absurd； but something else as well；〃 muttered
Trudolyubov； naively taking my part。 〃You are not hard enough
upon it。 It was simply rudenessunintentional； of course。 And
how could Simonov。。。h'm！〃
〃If a trick like that had been played on me；〃 observed
Ferfitchkin； 〃I should。。。〃
〃But you should have ordered something for yourself；〃 Zverkov
interrupted； 〃or simply asked for dinner without waiting for us。〃
〃You will allow that I might have done that without your
permission；〃 I rapped out。 〃If I waited； it was。。。〃
〃Let us sit down； gentlemen；〃 cried Simonov； coming in。
〃Everything is ready； I can answer for the champagne； it is
capitally frozen。。。。You see； I did not know your address； where
was I to look for you？〃 he suddenly turned to me； but again he
seemed to avoid looking at me。 Evidently he had something
against me。 It must have been what happened yesterday。
All sat down； I did the same。 It was a round table。 Trudolyubov
was on my left； Simonov on my right； Zverkov was sitting
opposite； Ferfitchkin next to him； between him and Trudolyubov。
〃Tell me； are you。。。in a government office？〃 Zverkov went on
attending to me。 Seeing that I was embarrassed he seriously
thought that he ought to be friendly to me； and； so to speak；
cheer me up。
〃Does he want me to throw a bottle at his head？〃 I thought； in a
fury。 In my novel surroundings I was unnaturally ready to be
irritated。
〃In the N… office；〃 I answered jerkily； with my eyes on my
plate。
〃And ha…ave you a go…od berth？ I say； what ma…a…de you leave
your original job？〃
〃What ma…a…de me was that I wanted to leave my original job；〃 I
drawled more than he； hardly able to control myself。 Ferfitchkin
went off into a guffaw。 Simonov looked at me ironically。
Trudolyubov left off eating and began looking at me with
curiosity。
Zverkov winced； but he tried not to notice it。
〃And the remuneration？〃
〃What remuneration？〃
〃I mean； your sa…a…lary？〃
〃Why are you cross…examining me？〃 However； I told him at once
what my salary was。 I turned horribly red。
〃It is not very handsom