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So there was a new double…star in the living firmament。 The
constellations seemed to kindle with new splendors as the student and
the story…teller walked homeward in their light； Alioth and Algol
looked down on them as on the first pair of lovers they shone over；
and the autumn air seemed full of harmonies as when the morning stars
sang together。
XII
The old Master had asked us； the Young Astronomer and myself； into
his library； to hear him read some passages from his interleaved
book。 We three had formed a kind of little club without knowing it
from the time when the young man began reading those extracts from
his poetical reveries which I have reproduced in these pages。
Perhaps we agreed in too many things；I suppose if we could have had
a good hard…headed； old…fashioned New England divine to meet with us
it might have acted as a wholesome corrective。 For we had it all our
own way； the Lady's kindly remonstrance was taken in good part； but
did not keep us from talking pretty freely； and as for the Young
Girl； she listened with the tranquillity and fearlessness which a
very simple trusting creed naturally gives those who hold it。 The
fewer outworks to the citadel of belief； the fewer points there are
to be threatened and endangered。
The reader must not suppose that I even attempt to reproduce
everything exactly as it took place in our conversations； or when we
met to listen to the Master's prose or to the Young Astronomer's
verse。 I do not pretend to give all the pauses and interruptions by
question or otherwise。 I could not always do it if I tried； but I do
not want to； for oftentimes it is better to let the speaker or reader
go on continuously； although there may have been many breaks in the
course of the conversation or reading。 When； for instance； I by and
by reproduce what the Landlady said to us； I shall give it almost
without any hint that it was arrested in its flow from time to time
by various expressions on the part of the hearers。
I can hardly say what the reason of it was； but it is very certain
that I had a vague sense of some impending event as we took our seats
in the Master's library。 He seemed particularly anxious that we
should be comfortably seated； and shook up the cushions of the arm…
chairs himself； and got them into the right places。
Now go to sleephe saidor listen；just which you like best。 But
I am going to begin by telling you both a secret。
Liberavi animam meam。 That is the meaning of my book and of my
literary life； if I may give such a name to that party…colored shred
of human existence。 I have unburdened myself in this book； and in
some other pages； of what I was born to say。 Many things that I have
said in my ripe days have been aching in my soul since I was a mere
child。 I say aching； because they conflicted with many of my
inherited beliefs； or rather traditions。 I did not know then that
two strains of blood were striving in me for the mastery；two！
twenty； perhaps；twenty thousand； for aught I know；but represented
to me by two；paternal and maternal。 Blind forces in themselves；
shaping thoughts as they shaped features and battled for the moulding
of constitution and the mingling of temperament。
Philosophy and poetry cameto me before I knew their names。
Je fis mes premiers vers； sans savoir les ecrire。
Not verses so much as the stuff that verses are made of。 I don't
suppose that the thoughts which came up of themselves in my mind were
so mighty different from what come up in the minds of other young
folks。 And that 's the best reason I could give for telling 'em。 I
don't believe anything I've written is as good as it seemed to me
when I wrote it；he stopped； for he was afraid he was lying；not
much that I 've written； at any rate；he saidwith a smile at the
honesty which made him qualify his statement。 But I do know this： I
have struck a good many chords； first and last； in the consciousness
of other people。 I confess to a tender feeling for my little brood
of thoughts。 When they have been welcomed and praised it has pleased
me； and if at any time they have been rudely handled and despitefully
entreated it has cost me a little worry。 I don't despise reputation；
and I should like to be remembered as having said something worth
lasting well enough to last。
But all that is nothing to the main comfort I feel as a writer。 I
have got rid of something my mind could not keep to itself and rise
as it was meant to into higher regions。 I saw the aeronauts the
other day emptying from the bags some of the sand that served as
ballast。 It glistened a moment in the sunlight as a slender shower；
and then was lost and seen no more as it scattered itself unnoticed。
But the airship rose higher as the sand was poured out； and so it
seems to me I have felt myself getting above the mists and clouds
whenever I have lightened myself of some portion of the mental
ballast I have carried with me。 Why should I hope or fear when I
send out my book？ I have had my reward； for I have wrought out my
thought； I have said my say； I have freed my soul。 I can afford to
be forgotten。
Look here！he said。 I keep oblivion always before me。…He pointed
to a singularly perfect and beautiful trilobite which was lying on a
pile of manuscripts。…Each time I fill a sheet of paper with what I
am writing； I lay it beneath this relic of a dead world； and project
my thought forward into eternity as far as this extinct crustacean
carries it backward。 When my heart beats too lustily with vain hopes
of being remembered； I press the cold fossil against it and it grows
calm。 I touch my forehead with it； and its anxious furrows grow
smooth。 Our world； too； with all its breathing life； is but a leaf
to be folded with the other strata； and if I am only patient； by and
by I shall be just as famous as imperious Caesar himself； embedded
with me in a conglomerate。
He began reading：〃There is no new thing under the sun；〃 said the
Preacher。 He would not say so now； if he should come to life for a
little while； and have his photograph taken； and go up in a balloon；
and take a trip by railroad and a voyage by steamship； and get a
message from General Grant by the cable； and see a man's leg cut off
without its hurting him。 If it did not take his breath away and lay
him out as flat as the Queen of Sheba was knocked over by the
splendors of his court； he must have rivalled our Indians in the nil
admarari line。
For all that； it is a strange thing to see what numbers of new things
are really old。 There are many modern contrivances that are of as
early date as the first man； if not thousands of centuries older。
Everybody knows how all the arrangements of our telescopes and
microscopes are anticipated in the eye； and how our best musical
instruments are surpassed by the larynx。 But there are some very odd
things any anatomist can tell； showing how our recent contrivances
are anticipated in the human body。 In the alimentary canal are
certain pointed eminences called villi； and certain ridges called
valvuloe conniventes。 The makers of heating apparatus have exactly
reproduced the first in the 〃pot〃