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letters to his son, 1752-第29章

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ers and the marks of youth and inexperience。  If you receive the matter kindly; and observe my prescriptions scrupulously; you will secure the future advantages of time and join them to the present inestimable ones of one…and…twenty。

I most earnestly recommend one thing to you; during your present stay at Paris。  I own it is not the most agreeable; but I affirm it to be the most useful thing in the world to one of your age; and therefore I do hope that you will force and constrain yourself to do it。  I mean; to converse frequently; or rather to be in company frequently with both men and women much your superiors in age and rank。  I am very sensible that; at your age; 'vous y entrez pour peu de chose; et meme souvent pour rien; et que vous y passerez meme quelques mauvais quart…d'heures'; but no matter; you will be a solid gainer by it: you will see; hear; and learn the turn and manners of those people; you will gain premature experience by it; and it will give you a habit of engaging and respectful attentions。  Versailles; as much as possible; though probably unentertaining: the Palais Royal often; however dull: foreign ministers of the first rank; frequently; and women; though old; who are respectable and respected for their rank or parts; such as Madame de Pusieux; Madame de Nivernois; Madame d'Aiguillon; Madame Geoffrain; etc。  This 'sujetion'; if it be one to you; will cost you but very little in these three or four months that you are yet to pass in Paris; and will bring you in a great deal; nor will it; nor ought it; to hinder you from being in a more entertaining company a great part of the day。  'Vous pouvez; si vous le voulex; tirer un grand parti de ces quatre mois'。  May God make you so; and bless you! Adieu。




LETTER CLXXXII

BATH; November 16; O。 S。  1752。

MY DEAR FRIEND: Vanity; or to call it by a gentler name; the desire of admiration and applause; is; perhaps; the most universal principle of human actions; I do not say that it is the best; and I will own that it is sometimes the cause of both foolish and criminal effects。  But it is so much oftener the principle of right things; that though they ought to have a better; yet; considering human nature; that principle is to be encouraged and cherished; in consideration of its effects。  Where that desire is wanting; we are apt to be indifferent; listless; indolent; and inert; we do not exert our powers; and we appear to be as much below ourselves as the vainest man living can desire to appear above what he really is。

As I have made you my confessor; and do not scruple to confess even my weaknesses to you; I will fairly own that I had that vanity; that weakness; if it be one; to a prodigious degree; and; what is more; I confess it without repentance: nay; I am glad I had it; since; if I have had the good fortune to please in the world; it is to that powerful and active principle that I owe it。  I began the world; not with a bare desire; but with an insatiable thirst; a rage of popularity; applause; and admiration。  If this made me do some silly things on one hand; it made me; on the other hand; do almost all the right things that I did; it made me attentive and civil to the women I disliked; and to the men I despised; in hopes of the applause of both: though I neither desired; nor would I have accepted the favors of the one; nor the friendship of the other。  I always dressed; looked; and talked my best; and; I own; was overjoyed whenever I perceived; that by all three; or by any one of them; the company was pleased with me。  To men; I talked whatever I thought would give them the best opinion of my parts and learning; and to women; what I was sure would please them; flattery; gallantry; and love。  And; moreover; I will own to you; under the secrecy of confession; that my vanity has very often made me take great pains to make a woman in love with me; if I could; for whose person I would not have given a pinch of snuff。  In company with men; I always endeavored to outshine; or at least; if possible; to equal the most shining man in it。  This desire elicited whatever powers I had to gratify it; and where I could not perhaps shine in the first; enabled me; at least; to shine in a second or third sphere。  By these means I soon grew in fashion; and when a man is once in fashion; all he does is right。  It was infinite pleasure to me to find my own fashion and popularity。  I was sent for to all parties of pleasure; both of men or women; where; in some measure; I gave the 'ton'。 This gave me the reputation of having had some women of condition; and that reputation; whether true or false; really got me others。  With the men I was a Proteus; and assumed every shape; in order to please them all: among the gay; I was the gayest; among the grave; the gravest; and I never omitted the least attentions of good…breeding; or the least offices of friendship; that could either please; or attach them to me: and accordingly I was soon connected with all the men of any fashion or figure in town。

To this principle of vanity; which philosophers call a mean one; and which I do not; I owe great part of the figure which I have made in life。 I wish you had as much; but I fear you have too little of it; and you seem to have a degree of laziness and listlessness about you that makes you indifferent as to general applause。  This is not in character at your age; and would be barely pardonable in an elderly and philosophical man。 It is a vulgar; ordinary saying; but it is a very true one; that one should always put the best foot foremost。  One should please; shine; and dazzle; wherever it is possible。  At Paris; I am sure you must observe 'que chacun se fait valoir autant qu'il est possible'; and La Bruyere observes; very justly; qu'on ne vaut dans ce monde que ce qu'on veut valoir': wherever applause is in question; you will never see a French man; nor woman; remiss or negligent。  Observe the eternal attentions and politeness that all people have there for one another。  'Ce n'est pas pour leurs beaux yeux au moins'。  No; but for their own sakes; for commendations and applause。  Let me then recommend this principle of vanity to you; act upon it 'meo periculo'; I promise you it will turn to your account。  Practice all the arts that ever coquette did; to please。 Be alert and indefatigable in making every man admire; and every woman in love with you。  I can tell you too; that nothing will carry you higher in the world。

I have had no letter from you since your arrival at Paris; though you must have been long enough there to have written me two or three。  In about ten or twelve days I propose leaving this place; and going to London; I have found considerable benefit by my stay here; but not all that I want。  Make my compliments to Lord Albemarle。




LETTER CLXXXIII

BATH; November 28; 1752

MY DEAR FRIEND: Since my last to you; I have read Madame Maintenon's 〃Letters〃; I am sure they are genuine; and they both entertained and informed me。  They have brought me acquainted with the character of that able and artful lady; whom I am convinced that I now know much better than her directeur the Abby de Fenelon (afterward Archbishop of Cambray) did; when he wrote her the 185th letter
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