samantha at saratoga-第49章

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ck　（most　the　hull　length　on　it　bare；　as　I　am　a　livin'　creeter）；　and　says　she；；〃　How　do　you　like　my　dress？〃　〃Oh；〃　says　I；　wantin'　to　make　myself　agreeable　（both　on　account　of　principle；　and　the　lawsuit）；　〃the　skirts　are　beautiful　but　I　can't　judge　how　the　hull　dress　looks；　you　know；　till　you　get　your　waist　on。〃　〃My　waist？〃　says　she。　〃Yes；〃　says　I。　〃I　have　got　it　on；〃　says　she。　〃Where　is　it？〃　says　I；　a　lookin'　at　her　closer　through　my　specks；　〃Where　is　the　waist？〃　〃Here；〃　says　she；　a　pintin'　to　a　pink　belt　ribbon；　and　a　string　of　beads　over　each　shoulder。　Says　I；　〃Miss　Flamm；　do　you　call　that　a　waist？〃　〃Yes；〃　says　she；　and　she　balanced　herself　on　her　little　pink　tottlin'　slippers。　　She　couldn't　walk　in　'em　a　good　honerable　walk　to　save　her　life。　　How　could　she；　with　the　instep　not　over　two　inches　acrost；　and　the　heels　right　under　the　middle　of　her　foot；　more'n　a　finger　high？　　Good　land；　they　wuz　enuff　to　lame　a　Injun　savage；　and　curb　him　in。　　But　she　sort　o'　balanced　herself　unto　'em；　the　best　she　could；　and　put　her　hands　round　her　waist　　it　wuzn't　much　bigger　than　a　pipe…stem；　and　sort　o'　bulgin'　out　both　ways；　above　and　below；　some　like　a　string　tied　tight　round　a　piller；　…　and　says　she　complacently；　〃I　don't　believe　there　will　be　a　dress　shown　to…night　more　stylish　and　beautiful　than　mine。〃　Says　I；　〃Do　you　tell　me；　Miss　Flamm；　that　you　are　a　goin'　down　into　that　crowd　of　promiscus　men　and　women；　with　nothin'　but　them　strings　on　to　cover　you？〃　　Says　I；　〃Do　you　tell　me　that；　and　you　a　perfesser　and　a　Christian？〃　〃Yes；〃　says　she；　〃I　paid　300　dollars　for　this　dress；　and　it　haint　likely　I　am　goin'　to　miss　the　chance　of　showin'　it　off　to　the　other　wimmen　who　will　envy　me　the　possession　of　it。　　To　be　sure；〃　says　she；　〃it　is　a　little　lower　than　Americans　usually　wear。　　But　in　fashion；　as　in　anything　else；　somebody　has　got　to　go　ahead。　This　is　the　very　heighth　of　fashion；〃　says　she。　Says　I　in　witherin'　and　burnin'　skorn；　〃It　is　the　heighth　of　immodesty。〃　And　I　jest　turned　my　back　right　ont'　her；　and　sailed　out　of　the　room。　　I　wuzn't　a　a　goin'　to　stand　that；　lawsuit　or　no　lawsuit。　　I　wuz　all　worked　up　in　my　mind；　and　by　the　side　of　myself；　and　I　didn't　get　over　it　for　some　time；　neither。　Wall；　I　found　my　companion　seated　in　that　comfertable　place；　and　a　keepin'　my　chair　for　me；　and　so　I　sot　down　by　him；　and　truly　we　sot　still；　and　see　the　glory；　and　the　magnificence　on　every　side　on　us。　　There　wuz　3　piazzas　about　as　long　as　from　our　house　to　Jonesville；　or　from　Jonesville　to　Loontown；　all　filled　with　folks　magnificently　dressed；　and　a　big　garden　layin'　between　'em　about　as　big　as　from　our　house　to　Miss　Gowdey's；　and　so　round　crossways　to　Alminy　Hagidone's　brother's；　and　back　agin'。　　It　wuz　full　as　fur　as　that；　and　you　know　well　that　that　is　a　great　distance。　There　wuz　some　big　noble　trees；　all　twinklin'　full　of　lights；　of　every　coler；　and　rows　of　shinin'　lights；　criss…crossed　every　way；　or　that　is；　every　beautiful　way；　from　the　high　ornimental　pillers　of　the　immense　house；　that　loomed　up　in　the　distance　round　us　on　every　side；　same　as　the　mountains　loom　up　round　Loontown。　There　wuz　a　big　platform　built　in　the　middle　of　the　garden；　with　sweet　music　discoursin'　from　it　the　most　enchantin'　strains。　　And　the　fountains　wuz　sprayin'　out　the　most　beautiful　colers　you　ever　see　in　your　life；　and　fallin'　down　in　pink；　and　yellow；　and　gold；　and　green；　and　amber；　and　silver　water；　sparklin'　down　onto　the　green　beautiful　ferns　and　flowers　that　loved　to　grow　round　the　big　marble　basin　which　shone　white；　risin'　out　of　the　green　velvet　of　the　grass。　Josiah　looked　at　that　water；　and　sez　he；　〃Samantha；　I'd　love　to　get　some　of　that　water　to　pass　round　evenin's　when　we　have　company。〃　　Sez　he；　〃It　would　look　so　dressy　and　fashionable　to　pass　round　pink　water；　or　light　blue；　or　light　yeller。　　How　it　would　make　Uncle　Nate　Gowdey　open　his　eyes。　　I　believe　I　shall　buy　some　bottles　of　it；　Samantha；　to　take　home。　　What　do　you　say？　I　don't　suppose　it　would　cost　such　a　dretful　sight；　do　you？〃　Sez　he；　〃I　s'pose　all　they　have　to　do　is　to　put　pumps　down　into　a　pink　spring；　or　a　yeller　one；　as　the　case　may　be；　and　pump。　　And　I　would　be　willin'　to　pump　it　up　myself；　if　it　would　come　cheaper。〃　But　my　companion　soon　forgot　to　follow　up　the　theme　in　lookin'　about　him　onto　the　magnificent；　seen；　and　a　seein'　the　throngs　of　men　and　wimmen　growin'　more　and　more　denser；　and　every　crowd　on　'em　that　swept　by　us；　and　round　us；　and　before　us；　a　growin'　more　gorgus　in　dress；　or　so　it　seemed　to　us。　　Gemms　of　every　gorgus　coler　under　the　heavens　and　some　jest　the　coler　of　the　heavens　when　it　is　blue　and　shinin'　or　when　it　is　purplish　dark　in　the　night　time；　or　when　it　is　full　of　white　fleecy　clouds；　or　when　it　is　a　shinin'　with　stars。　Why；　one　woman　had　so　many　diamonds　on　that　she　had　a　detective　follerin'　her　all　round　wherever　she　went。　　She　wuz　a　blaze　of　splendor　and　so　wuz　lots　of　'em；　though　like　the　stars；　they　differed　from　each　other　in　glory。　But　whatever　coler　their　gowns　wuz；　in　one　thing　they　wuz　most　all　alike　　most　all　of　'em　had　waists　all　drawed　in　tight；　but　a　bulgin'　out　on　each　side；　more　or　less　as　the　case　might　be。　　Why　some　of　them　waists　wuzn't　much　bigger　than　pipe's　tails　and　so　I　told　Josiah。　And　he　whispered　back　to　me；　and　sez　he；　〃I　wonder　if　them　wimmen　with　wasp　waists；　think　that　we　men　like　the　looks　on　'em。　　They　make　a　dumb　mistake　if　they　do。　　Why；〃　sez　he；　〃we　men　know　what　they　be；　we　know　they　are　nothin'　but　crushed　bones　and　flesh。〃　Sez　he；　〃I　could　make　my　own　waist　look　jest　like　'em；　if　I　should　take　a　rope　and　strap　myself　down。〃　〃Wall；〃　sez　I；　in　agitated　axents；　〃don't　you　try　to　go　into　no　such　enterprise；　Josiah　Allen。〃　I　remembered　the　eppisode　of　the　afternoon；　and　I　sez　in　anxins　axents；　and　affectionate；　〃Besides　not　lookin'　well；　it　is　dangerous；　awful　dangerous。　　And　how　I　should　blush；〃　sez　I；　〃if　I　wuz　to　see　you　with　a　leather　strap　or　a　rope　round　your　waist　under　your　coat；　a　drawin'　you　in　；　a　changin'　your　good　honerable　shape。　　And　God　made　men's　and　wimmen's　waists　jest　alike　in　the　first　place；　and　it　is　jest　as　smart　for　men　to　deform　themselves　in　that　way　as　it　is　for　wimmen。　　But　oh；　the　agony　of　my　soul　if　I　should　see　you　a　tryin'　to　disfigure　yourself　in　that　way。〃　〃You　needn't　be　afraid；　Samantha；〃　sez　he；　〃I　am　dressy；　and　always　wuz；　but　I　haint　such　a　fool　as　that；　as　to　kill　myself　in　perfect　agony；　for　fashion。〃　I　didn't　say　nothin'　but　instinctively　I　looked　down　at　his　feet；　〃Oh；　you　needn't　look　at　my　feet；　Samantha；　feet　are　very　different　from　the　heart；　and　lungs；　and　such。　　You　can　squeeze　your　feet　down；　and　not　hurt　much　moren　the　flesh　and　bones。　　But　you　are　a　destroyin'　the　very　seat　of　life　when　you　draw　your　waist　in　as　them　wimmen　do。〃　〃I　know　it；〃　sez　I；　〃but　I　wouldn't　torture　myself　in　any　way　if　I　wuz　in　your　place。〃　〃I　don't　lay　out　to；〃　sez　he。　　〃I　haint　a　goin'　to　wear　corsets；　it　haint　at　all　probable　I　shall；　though　I　am　better　able　to　stand　it；　than　wimmen　be。〃　〃I　know　that；〃　sez　I。　　〃I　know　men　are　stronger　and　better　able　to　bear　the　strain　of　bein'　drawed　in　and　tapered。〃　　I　am　reesonable；　and　will　ever　speak　truthful　and　honest；　and　this　I　couldn't　deny　and　didn't　try　to。　〃Wall；