samantha at saratoga-第39章

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d　forth；　to　and　fro；　to　and　fro。　　I　didn't　enjoy　it　so　much　as　some　did；　though　for　a　few　　minutes　at　a　time　I　looked　upon　it　as　a　sort　of　a　recreation；　some　like　a　circus；　only　more　wilder。　But　some　folks　enjoyed　it　dretfully。　　Yes；　they　set　a　great　deal　on　piazzas　at　Saratoga。　　And　when　I　say　set　on　'em；　I　mean　they　set　a　great　store　on　'em；　and　they　set　on　'em　a　great　deal。　　Some　folks　set　on　'em　so　much；　that　I　called　them　setters。　　Real　likely　creeters　they　are　too；　some　on　'em；　and　handsome；　　some　pious；　sober　ones；　some　sort　a　gay。　　Some　not　married　at　all；　and　some　married　a　good　deal；　and　when　I　say　a　good　deal　I　meen；　they　have　had　various　companions　and　lost　'em。　Now　there　wuz　one　woman　that　I　liked　quite　well。　She　had　had　4　husbands　countin'　in　the　present　one。　　She　wuz　a　good　lookin'　woman　and　had　seen　trouble。　　It　stands　to　reeson　she　had　with　4　husbands。　　Good　land！　She　showed　me　one　day　a　ring　she　wore。　　She　had　took　the　weddin'　rings　of　her　4　pardners　and　had　'em　all　run　together；　and　the　initials　of　their　first　names　carved　inside　on　it。　　Her　first　husband's　name　wuz　Franklin；　her　next　two　wuz　Orville　and　Obed；　and　her　last　and　livin'　one　Lyman。　　Wall；　she　meant　well；　but　she　never　see　what　would　be　the　end　on't　and　how　it　would　read　till　she　had　got　their　initials　all　carved　out　on　it。　She　wuz　dretfully　worked　up　about　it；　but　I　see　that　it　wuz　right。　　For　nobody　but　a　fool　would　want　to　run　all　these　recollections　and　memories　together；　all　the　different　essociations　and　emotions；　that　must　cluster　round　each　of　them　rings。　　The　idee　of　runnin'　'em　all　together　with　the　livin'　one！　　It　wuz　ectin'　like　a　fool　and　it　seemed　fairly　providential　that　their　names　run　in　jest　that　way。　Why；　if　I　had　had　2　husbands；　or　even　4；　I　should　want　to　keep　'em　apart　…　settin'　up　in　high　chairs　on　different　sides　of　my　heart。　　Why；　if　I'd　had　4；　I'd　have　'em　to　the　different　pints　of　the　compass；　east；　west；　north；　south；　as　far　apart　from　each　other　as　my　heart　would　admit　of。　　Ketch　me　a　lumpin'　in　all　the　precious　memories　of　my　Josiah　with　them　of　any　other　man；　bond　or　free；　Jew　or　Genteel；　no；　and　I'd　refrain　from　tellin'　to　the　new　one　about　the　other　ones。　No；　when　a　pardner　dies　and　you　set　out　to　take　another　one；　bury　the　one　that　has　gone　right　under　his　own　high　chair　in　your　heart；　don't　keep　him　up　there　a　rattlin'　his　bones　before　the　eyes　of　the　2d；　and　angerin'　him；　and　agonizen'　your　own　heart。　　Bury　him　before　you　bring　a　new　one　into　the　same　room。　And　never！　never！　even　in　moments　of　the　greatest　anger；　dig　him　up　agin　or　even　weep　over　his　grave；　before　the　new　pardner。　　No；　under　the　moonlight；　and　the　stars；　before　God　only；　and　your　own　soul；　you　may　lay　there　in　spirit　on　that　grave；　weep　over　it；　keep　the　turf　green。　　But　not　before　any　one　else。　　And　I　wouldn't　advise　you　to　go　there　alone　any　too　often。　　I　would　advise　you　to　spend　your　spare　time　ornementin'　the　high　chair　where　the　new　one　sets；　wreathin'　it　round　with　whatever　blossoms　and　trailin'　vines　of　tenderness　and　romance　you　have　left　over　from　the　first　great　romance　of　life。　It　would　be　better　for　you　in　the　end。　I　said　some　few　of　these　little　thoughts　to　the　female　mentioned；　and　I　s'pose　I　impressed　her　dretfully；　I　s'pose　I　did。　　But　I　couldn't　stay　to　see　the　full　effects　on't；　for　another　female　setter　came　up　at　that　minute　to　talk　with　her；　and　my　companion　came　up　at　that　very　minute　to　ask　me　to　go　a　walkin'　with　him　up　to　the　cemetery。　That　is　a　very　favorite　place　for　Josiah　Allen。　　He　often　used　to　tell　the　children　when　they　wuz　little；　that　if　they　wuz　real　good　he　would　take　'em　out　on　a　walk　to　the　grave…yard。　And　when　I　first　married　to　him；　if　I　hadn't　broke　it　up；　that　would　have　been　the　only　place　of　resort　that　he　would　have　took　me　to　Summers。　　But　I　broke　it　up　after　a　while。　　Good　land！　there　is　times　to　go　any　where　and　times　to　stay　away。　　I　didn't　want　to　go　a　trailin'　up　there　every　day　or　two；　jest　married　too！　But　to…day　I　felt　willin'　to　go。　　I　had　been　a　lookin'　so　long　at　the　crowd　a　fillin'　the　streets　full；　and　every　one　on　'em　in　motion；　that　I　thought　it　would　be　sort　a　restful　to　go　out　to　a　place　where　they　wuz　still。　　And　so　after　a　short　walk　we　came　to　the　village　that　haint　stirred　by　any　commotion　or　alarm。　　Where　the　houses　are　roofed　with　green　grass　and　daisies；　and　the　white　stun　doors　don't　open　to　let　in　trouble　or　joy；　and　where　the　inhabitants　don't　ride　out　in　the　afternoon。　Wall；　if　I　should　tell　the　truth　which　I　am　fur　from　not　wantin'　to　do；　I　should　say　that　at　first　sight；　it　wuz　rather　of　a　bleak；　lonesome　lookin'　spot；　kinder　wild　and　desolate　lookin'。　But　as　we　went　further　along　in　it；　we　came　to　some　little　nooks　and　sheltered　paths　and　spots；　that　seemed　more　collected　together　and　pleasant。　　There　wuz　some　big　high　stuns　and　monuments；　and　some　little　ones　but　not　one　so　low　that　it　hadn't　cast　a　high；　dark　shadow　over　somebody's　life。　There　wuz　one　in　the　shape　of　a　big　see　shell。　　I　s'pose　some　mariner　lay　under　that；　who　loved　the　sea。　　Or　mebby　it　wuz　put　up　by　some　one　who　had　the　odd　fancy　that　put　a　shell　to　your　ear　you　will　hear　a　whisperin'　in　it　of　a　land　fur　away；　fur　away。　Not　fur　from　this　wuz　a　stun　put　up　over　a　young　engineer　who　had　been　killed　instantly　by　his　engine。　　There　wuz　a　picture　of　the　locomotive　scraped　out　on　the　stun；　and　in　the　cab　of　the　engine　wuz　his　photograph；　and　these　lines　wuz　underneath：　　　　　　　　　　　　My　engine　now　lies　still　and　cold；　　　　　　　　　　　　No　water　does　her　boiler　hold；　　　　　　　　　　　　The　wood　supplies　its　flames　no　more；　　　　　　　　　　　　My　days　of　usefulness　are　o'er。　We　wended　our　way　in　and　out　of　the　silent　streets　for　quite　a　spell；　and　then　we　went　and　sot　down　on　the　broad　piazza　of　the　sort　of　chapel　and　green…house　that　stood　not　fur　from　the　entrance。　　And　while　we　sot　there　we　see　another　inhabitent　come　there　to　the　village　to　stay。　It　wuz　a　long　procession；　fur　it　wuz　a　good　man　who　had　come。　And　many　of　his　friends　come　with　him　jest　as　fur　as　they　could：　wife；　children；　and　friends；　they　come　with　him　jest　as　fur　as　they　could；　and　then　he　had　to　leave　'em　and　go　on　alone。　　How　weak　love　is；　and　how　strong。　　It　wuz　too　weak　to　hold　him　back；　or　go　with　him；　though　they　would　fain　have　done　so。　　But　it　wuz　strong　enough　to　shadow　the　hull　world　with　its　blackness；　blot　out　the　sun　and　the　stars；　and　scale　the　very　mounts　of　heaven　with　its　wild　complaints　and　pleadin's。　　A　strange　thing　love　is；　haint　it？　Wall；　we　sot　there　for　quite　a　spell　and　my　companion　wantin'；　I　spose；　to　make　me　happy；　took　out　a　daily　paper　out　of　his　pocket　and　went　to　readin'　the　deaths　to　me。　　He　always　loves　to　read　the　deaths　and　marriages　in　a　paper。　　He　sez　that　is　the　literature　that　interests　him。　　And　then　I　s'pose　he　thought　at　such　a　time；　it　wuz　highly　appropriate。　　So　I　didn't　break　it　up　till　he　began　to　read　a　long　obituary　piece　about　a　child's　death；　about　its　being　cut　down　like　a　flower　by　a　lightin'　stroke　out　of　a　cloudless　sky；　and　about　what　a　mysterious　dispensation　of　Providence　it　wuz；　etc。；　etc。　　And　then　there　wuz　a　hull　string　of　poetry　dedicated　to　the　heart…broken　mother　bewailin'　the　mystery　on't；　and　wonderi