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before。〃 Well； up the mast the sailors skipped； The selvagee was soon
unshipped； And all were merry。 Again a day； and JASPER came： 〃I p'r'aps
deserve your honour's blame； I can't make up my mind；〃 said he； 〃About
that cursed selvagee … It's foolish … very。
〃On Monday night I could have sworn That maintop…stay it should
adorn； On Tuesday morning I could swear That selvagee should not be
there。 The knot's a rasper！〃 〃Oh； you be hanged；〃 said CAPTAIN P。； 〃Here；
go ashore at Caribbee。 Get out … good bye … shove off … all right！〃 Old
JASPER soon was out of sight … Farewell； old JASPER！
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Ballad： The Cunning Woman
On all Arcadia's sunny plain； On all Arcadia's hill； None were so blithe
as BILL and JANE； So blithe as JANE and BILL。
No social earthquake e'er occurred To rack their common mind： To
them a Panic was a word … A Crisis； empty wind。
No Stock Exchange disturbed the lad With overwhelming shocks …
BILL ploughed with all the shares he had； JANE planted all her stocks。
And learn in what a simple way Their pleasures they enhanced … JANE
danced like any lamb all day； BILL piped as well as danced。
Surrounded by a twittling crew； Of linnet； lark； and thrush； BILL
treated his young lady to This sentimental gush：
〃Oh； JANE； how true I am to you！ How true you are to me！ And how
we woo； and how we coo！ So fond a pair are we！
〃To think； dear JANE； that anyways。 Your chiefest end and aim Is； one
of these fine summer days； To bear my humble name！〃
Quoth JANE； 〃Well； as you put the case； I'm true enough； no doubt；
But then； you see； in this here place There's none to cut you out。
〃But； oh！ if anybody came … A Lord or any such … I do not think your
humble name Would fascinate me much。
〃For though your mates； you often boast。 You distance out…and…out；
Still； in the abstract； you're a most Uncompromising lout！〃
Poor BILL； he gave a heavy sigh； He tried in vain to speak … A fat tear
started to each eye And coursed adown each cheek。
For； oh！ right well in truth he knew That very self…same day； The
LORD DE JACOB PILLALOO Was coming there to stay！
The LORD DE JACOB PILLALOO All proper maidens shun … He
loves all women； it is true； But never marries one。
Now JANE； with all her mad self…will； Was no coquette … oh no！ She
really loved her faithful BILL； And thus she tuned her woe：
〃Oh； willow； willow； o'er the lea！ And willow once again！ The Peer
will fall in love with me！ Why wasn't I made plain？〃
* * * * *
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A cunning woman lived hard by； A sorceressing dame；
MACCATACOMB DE SALMON…EYE Was her uncommon name。
To her good JANE； with kindly yearn For BILL'S increasing pain；
Repaired in secrecy to learn How best to make her plain。
〃Oh； JANE；〃 the worthy woman said； 〃This mystic phial keep； And
rub its liquor in your head Before you go to sleep。
〃When you awake next day； I trow； You'll look in form and hue To
others just as you do now … But not to PILLALOO！
〃When you approach him； you will find He'll think you coarse …
unkempt … And rudely bid you get behind； With undisguised contempt。〃
The LORD DE PILLALOO arrived With his expensive train； And
when in state serenely hived； He sent for BILL and JANE。
〃Oh； spare her； LORD OF PILLALOO！ （Said BILL） if wed you be；
There's anything I'D rather do Than flirt with LADY P。〃
The Lord he gazed in Jenny's eyes； He looked her through and through：
The cunning woman's prophecies Were clearly coming true。
LORD PILLALOO； the Rustic's Bane （Bad person he； and proud）； HE
LAUGHED HA！ HA！ AT PRETTY JANE； AND SNEERED AT HER
ALOUD！
He bade her get behind him then； And seek her mother's stye … Yet to
her native countrymen She was as fair as aye！
MACCATACOMB； continue green！ Grow； SALMON…EYE； in might；
Except for you； there might have been The deuce's own delight
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Ballad： Phrenology
〃Come； collar this bad man … Around the throat he knotted me Till I to
choke began … In point of fact； garotted me！〃
So spake SIR HERBERT WRITE To JAMES； Policeman Thirty…two …
All ruffled with his fight SIR HERBERT was； and dirty too。
Policeman nothing said （Though he had much to say on it）； But from
the bad man's head He took the cap that lay on it。
〃No； great SIR HERBERT WHITE … Impossible to take him up。 This
man is honest quite … Wherever did you rake him up？
〃For Burglars； Thieves； and Co。； Indeed； I'm no apologist； But I； some
years ago； Assisted a Phrenologist。
〃Observe his various bumps； His head as I uncover it： His morals lie in
lumps All round about and over it。〃
〃Now take him；〃 said SIR WHITE； 〃Or you will soon be rueing it；
Bless me！ I must be right； … I caught the fellow doing it！〃
Policeman calmly smiled； 〃Indeed you are mistaken； sir； You're
agitated … riled … And very badly shaken； sir。
〃Sit down； and I'll explain My system of Phrenology； A second； please；
remain〃 … （A second is horology）。
Policeman left his beat … （The Bart。； no longer furious； Sat down upon
a seat； Observing； 〃This is curious！〃）
〃Oh； surely； here are signs Should soften your rigidity： This gentleman
combines Politeness with timidity。
〃Of Shyness here's a lump … A hole for Animosity … And like my fist
his bump Of Impecuniosity。
〃Just here the bump appears Of Innocent Hilarity； And just behind his
ears Are Faith； and Hope； and Charity。
He of true Christian ways As bright example sent us is … This maxim
he obeys； 'SORTE TUA CONTENTUS SIS。'
〃There； let him go his ways； He needs no stern admonishing。〃 The
Bart。； in blank amaze； Exclaimed； 〃This is astonishing！
〃I MUST have made a mull； This matter I've been blind in it： Examine；
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please； MY skull； And tell me what you find in it。〃
That Crusher looked； and said； With unimpaired urba