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dy wit with which she extricated herself from the most embarrassing circumstances。
A young man； whose love she permitted； whose name was the chevalier de Cressy； was obliged； in order to visit her； to scale a terrace upon which a window opened； which conducted to the sleeping…room of his mistress。 He was generally accompanied by his valet； a good…looking youth； who； disliking a state of idleness； had contrived to insinuate himself into the good graces of the lady's maid。 The valet； during his master's stay with madame； had likewise ascended the terrace； and penetrated； by the aid of another window； into the chamber where reposed the object of his tender love。 All this was accomplished with as little noise as possible； in order to prevent the mischance of awakening the marquis de l'Hopital； who was quietly asleep in an adjoining room。
One clear moonlight night； at the very instant when M。 de Cressy was about to step out of the window； in order to return to his own apartment； a terrible crash of broken glass was heard。 The terrified chevalier sought the aid of his ladder； but it had disappeared。 Not knowing what to do； the chevalier returned to madame de l'Hopital； who； seized with terror； had only just time to conceal him in her chamber； when the marquis opened his window to ascertain the cause of all this confusion。 In an instant the alarm spread； and heads were popped out of the different windows of the castle； each vieing with the other in vociferating 〃Thieves！ thieves！ murder！ fire！〃
The unfortunate author of all this disturbance was the unlucky valet； who； in his overeagerness to reach his Dulcinea； had attempted to climb his ladder so nimbly； that it fell down； and； striking against the windows of a room near which he had fixed it； had broken several panes of glass。 The poor valet never stopped to replace the ladder； but； terrified as well as hurt by his rapid descent； scrambled off as well as he could； abandoning his master in his present critical situation。
The ladder thrown down in the courtyard was abundant proof that some audacious attempt had been made upon the lives and safety of the inhabitants of the castle； and the general determination was to catch the thieves： for； it was presumed； as no outlet for their escape was discernible； that they must be concealed within its walls。 The servants； with their master at their head； were speedily assembled for the purpose； when the absence of the chevalier de Cressy was observed。 Where could he be？ was the general wonder。 Was it possible that； amidst the universal uproar with which the castle had resounded； he had slept so soundly as to be yet unconscious of all this bustle？ An over…officious friend was upon the point of going to his chamber； to ascertain the cause of his absenting himself at such a moment； when madame de l'Hopital sent to request her husband would come to her immediately。 〃Sir；〃 said she； when they were alone； 〃the disturbance which has thus broken our rest is not the work of thieves； but originates in the shameless licentiousness of a man unworthy of his name and the rank he occupies。 The chevalier de Cressy； forgetful of his being your guest； and of respecting the honor of all beneath your roof； has dared to carry on a base intrigue with my woman； in whose apartment you will find him at this very minute。 A conduct so profligate and insulting fills me with an indignation which I think that you； sir； after what you have heard； cannot but partake。〃
The marquis de l'Hopital； who did not see the thing in the same serious light； sought to appease the virtuous indignation of his lady； and went himself to release the chevalier from his place of concealment； leading him thro' his own apartment to join the crowd of armed servants； who； as may be supposed； were unable to detect the supposed invaders of their repose。
On the following morning the chevalier as agreed upon； wrote a penitential letter to madame； entreating her pardon for his improper attentions to her servant； whom she affected to dismiss with every mark of gravest displeasure。 The weeping Abigail threw herself at the feet of her mistress： and the compassionate marquis （before whom the scene was enacted）； touched with pity； implored his lady to receive the afflicted and penitent Javotte once more into her service。 This was at length granted to his solicitations； and Javotte received a hundred louis as the price of her silence； and found it sufficient compensation for the bad opinion the marquis entertained of her virtue。
The second trick the marchioness played her husband was not less amusing。
The chevalier de Cressy and herself could not meet so frequently as both desired； and whilst suffering under the void occasioned by his absence； chance threw in her way a young relative of her husband's； a youth of about eighteen； as beautiful as Love； and as daring as that god。 They were then in the country during the fine days of summer； and both time and place were favorable to the prosecution of their growing passion。 One day madame de l'Hopital and her cousin were sauntering about the park heedless of the approaching dinner…hour； and equally deaf to the sound of the dinner…bell； which rung its accustomed peal in vain for them whose ears were occupied in listening to sweeter sounds。 At length the master of the house； alarmed at the protracted absence of his wife and friend； went himself； attended by many guests assembled at his house； in search of the stray ones； the servants likewise received orders to disperse themselves over the grounds in different directions； and madame de l'Hopital and her companion were only aroused to a recollection of the flight of time by hearing their names loudly shouted by a dozen different voices。 Fortunately they were just in time to separate in opposite paths； and thus to enter the castle without any suspicion being excited of their having been so recently in each other's company。 The marquis angrily remonstrated with his lady for having obliged him to send in search of her； and she excused herself by protesting that she had not heard the dinner…bell。 The marquis replied； that the thing was impossible； and after some angry discussion the matter rested there。
A few days after this the marchioness； with her husband and cousin； were rambling over the grounds； when they found themselves at the entrance of a hermitage； where madame de l'Hopital had told the marquis she had sat down to rest herself on the day of her failing to attend the dinner…hour。 M。 de l'Hopital resumed the dispute； by protesting that from this situation the dinner…bell might easily be heard： the lady continued firm in protesting it could not； till； at last； feigning extreme anger； she exclaimed。 〃Well then； sir； since you refuse to believe assertion； go yourself and ring the bell as loudly as you please； your cousin will remain here with me； and determine if it be possible to distinguish the sound from here。〃
The fool of a marquis set off in the height of his zeal to convince his wife； and； arriving at the turret where the bell was placed； began ringing it with all his might and main； leaving the lovers the undisturbed opportunity they were not slow in ta