按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
daughter； or your niece； he will； rather than not play the traitor with his gallantry； make his addresses to your grandmother； and ten to one； but in one shape or another； he will find means to ruin the peace of a family； in which he has been so kindly entertained。 What he cannot accomplish by dint of compliment； and personal attendance； he will endeavour to effect； by reinforcing these with billets…doux； songs； and verses； of which he always makes a provision for such purposes。 If he is detected in these efforts of treachery； and reproached with his ingratitude； he impudently declares； that what he had done was no more than simple gallantry； considered in France as an indispensible duty on every man who pretended to good breeding。 Nay； he will even affirm； that his endeavours to corrupt your wife； or your daughter； were the most genuine proofs he could give of his particular regard for your family。
If a Frenchman is capable of real friendship； it must certainly be the most disagreeable present he can possibly make to a man of a true English character； You know； Madam； we are naturally taciturn； soon tired of impertinence； and much subject to fits of disgust。 Your French friend intrudes upon you at all hours： he stuns you with his loquacity： he teases you with impertinent questions about your domestic and private affairs： he attempts to meddle in all your concerns； and forces his advice upon you with the most unwearied importunity： he asks the price of every thing you wear； and； so sure as you tell him undervalues it； without hesitation： he affirms it is in a bad taste； ill…contrived； ill…made； that you have been imposed upon both with respect to the fashion and the price； that the marquise of this； or the countess of that； has one that is perfectly elegant； quite in the bon ton； and yet it cost her little more than you gave for a thing that nobody would wear。
If there were five hundred dishes at table； a Frenchman will eat of all of them； and then complain he has no appetite。 This I have several times remarked。 A friend of mine gained a considerable wager upon an experiment of this kind： the petit maitre ate of fourteen different plats； besides the dessert； then disparaged the cook； declaring he was no better than a marmiton； or turnspit。
The French have the most ridiculous fondness for their hair； and this I believe they inherit from their remote ancestors。 The first race of French kings were distinguished by their long hair； and certainly the people of this country consider it as an indispensible ornament。 A Frenchman will sooner part with his religion than with his hair； which； indeed； no consideration will induce him to forego。 I know a gentleman afflicted with a continual head…ach； and a defluxion on his eyes； who was told by his physician that the best chance he had for being cured； would be to have his head close shaved； and bathed every day in cold water。 〃How （cried he） cut my hair？ Mr。 Doctor； your most humble servant！〃 He dismissed his physician； lost his eye…sight； and almost his senses； and is now led about with his hair in a bag； and a piece of green silk hanging like a screen before his face。 Count Saxe； and other military writers have demonstrated the absurdity of a soldier's wearing a long head of hair； nevertheless； every soldier in this country wears a long queue； which makes a delicate mark on his white cloathing； and this ridiculous foppery has descended even to the lowest class of people。 The decrotteur； who cleans your shoes at the corner of the Pont Neuf； has a tail of this kind hanging down to his rump； and even the peasant who drives an ass loaded with dung； wears his hair en queue； though； perhaps； he has neither shirt nor breeches。 This is the ornament upon which he bestows much time and pains； and in the exhibition of which he finds full gratification for his vanity。 Considering the harsh features of the common people in this country； their diminutive stature； their grimaces； and that long appendage； they have no small resemblance to large baboons walking upright； and perhaps this similitude has helped to entail upon them the ridicule of their neighbours。
A French friend tires out your patience with long visits； and； far from taking the most palpable hints to withdraw； when he perceives you uneasy he observes you are low…spirited； and therefore he will keep you company。 This perseverance shews that he must either be void of penetration； or that his disposition must be truly diabolical。 Rather than be tormented with such a fiend； a man had better turn him out of doors； even though at the hazard of being run thro' the body。
The French are generally counted insincere； and taxed with want of generosity。 But I think these reproaches are not well founded。 High…flown professions of friendship and attachment constitute the language of common compliment in this country； and are never supposed to be understood in the literal acceptation of the words； and； if their acts of generosity are but very rare； we ought to ascribe that rarity； not so much to a deficiency of generous sentiments； as to their vanity and ostentation； which engrossing all their funds； utterly disable them from exerting the virtues of beneficence。 Vanity； indeed； predominates among all ranks； to such a degree； that they are the greatest egotists in the world； and the most insignificant individual talks in company with the same conceit and arrogance； as a person of the greatest importance。 Neither conscious poverty nor disgrace will restrain him in the least either from assuming his full share of the conversation； or making big addresses to the finest lady； whom he has the smallest opportunity to approach： nor is he restrained by any other consideration whatsoever。 It is all one to him whether he himself has a wife of his own； or the lady a husband； whether she is designed for the cloister； or pre…ingaged to his best friend and benefactor。 He takes it for granted that his addresses cannot but be acceptable； and； if he meets with a repulse； he condemns her taste； but never doubts his own qualifications。
I have a great many things to say of their military character； and their punctilios of honour； which last are equally absurd and pernicious； but as this letter has run to an unconscionable length； I shall defer them till another opportunity。 Mean…while； I have the honour to be； with very particular esteemMadam； Your most obedient servant。
LETTER VIII
To MR。 M
LYONS； October 19； 1763。
DEAR SIR；I was favoured with yours at Paris； and look upon your reproaches as the proof of your friendship。 The truth is； I considered all the letters I have hitherto written on the subject of my travels； as written to your society in general； though they have been addressed to one individual of it； and if they contain any thing that can either amuse or inform； I desire that henceforth all I send may be freely perused by all the members。
With respect to my health； about which you so kindly enquire； I have nothing new to communicate。 I had reason to think that my bathing in the sea at Boulogne produced a good effect； in streng