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my presence； for I was assured he knew it not。 He had entered the
chamber as a lair； when weary and gorged with his horrid orgy； and
he had flung himself down to sleep without a suspicion that he was
not alone。 Even his grasping my sleeve was doubtless an act done
betwixt sleeping and waking； like his unconscious moans and
laughter； in some frightful dream。
Hours went on； then I trembled as I thought that soon the house
would be astir； that my maid would come to call me as usual； and
awake that ghastly sleeper。 And might he not have time to tear me；
as he tore the sheep； before any aid could arrive？ At last what I
dreaded came to passa light footstep on the landingthere is a
tap at the door。 A pause succeeds； and then the tapping is
renewed； and this time more loudly。 Then the madman stretched his
limbs； and uttered his moaning cry； and his eyes slowly opened
very slowly opened and met mine。 The girl waited a while ere she
knocked for the third time。 I trembled lest she should open the
door unbiddensee that grim thing； and bring about the worst。
I saw the wondering surprise in his haggard； bloodshot eyes； I saw
him stare at me half vacantly； then with a crafty yet wondering
look； and then I saw the devil of murder begin to peep forth from
those hideous eyes； and the lips to part as in a sneer； and the
wolfish teeth to bare themselves。 But I was not what I had been。
Fear gave me a new and a desperate composurea courage foreign to
my nature。 I had heard of the best method of managing the insane；
I could but try； I DID try。 Calmly； wondering at my own feigned
calm； I fronted the glare of those terrible eyes。 Steady and
undaunted was my gazemotionless my attitude。 I marveled at
myself； but in that agony of sickening terror I was OUTWARDLY firm。
They sink； they quail； abashed； those dreadful eyes； before the
gaze of a helpless girl； and the shame that is never absent from
insanity bears down the pride of strength； the bloody cravings of
the wild beast。 The lunatic moaned and drooped his shaggy head
between his gaunt； squalid hands。
I lost not an instant。 I rose； and with one spring reached the
door； tore it open； and； with a shriek； rushed through； caught the
wondering girl by the arm； and crying to her to run for her life；
rushed like the wind along the gallery； down the corridor； down the
stairs。 Mary's screams filled the house as she fled beside me。 I
heard a long…drawn； raging cry； the roar of a wild animal mocked of
its prey； and I knew what was behind me。 I never turned my headI
flew rather than ran。 I was in the hall already； there was a rush
of many feet； an outcry of many voices； a sound of scuffling feet；
and brutal yells； and oaths； and heavy blows； and I fell to the
ground crying； 〃Save me！〃 and lay in a swoon。 I awoke from a
delirious trance。 Kind faces were around my bed； loving looks were
bent on me by all； by my dear father and dear sisters； but I
scarcely saw them before I swooned again。
When I recovered from that long illness； through which I had been
nursed so tenderly； the pitying looks I met made me tremble。 I
asked for a looking…glass。 It was long denied me； but my
importunity prevailed at lasta mirror was brought。 My youth was
gone at one fell swoop。 The glass showed me a livid and haggard
face； blanched and bloodless as of one who sees a specter； and in
the ashen lips； and wrinkled brow； and dim eyes； I could trace
nothing of my old self。 The hair； too； jetty and rich before； was
now as white as snow； and in one night the ravages of half a
century had passed over my face。 Nor have my nerves ever recovered
their tone after that dire shock。 Can you wonder that my life was
blighted； that my lover shrank from me； so sad a wreck was I？
I am old nowold and alone。 My sisters would have had me to live
with them； but I chose not to sadden their genial homes with my
phantom face and dead eyes。 Reginald married another。 He has been
dead many years。 I never ceased to pray for him； though he left me
when I was bereft of all。 The sad weird is nearly over now。 I am
old； and near the end； and wishful for it。 I have not been bitter
or hard； but I cannot bear to see many people； and am best alone。
I try to do what good I can with the worthless wealth Lady
Speldhurst left me； for； at my wish； my portion was shared between
my sisters。 What need had I of inheritance？I； the shattered
wreck made by that one night of horror！
End