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honor； to observe this article in our contractnot to breathe to a
soul the proprietor's name。〃
Now； can you understand the meaning of my sudden journeys； my
mysterious comings and goings？ Now； do you know whither those
beautiful things； which the world supposes to be sold； have flown？ Do
you perceive the ultimate motive of my change of investment？ Love； my
dear； is a vast business； and they who would succeed in it should have
no other。 Henceforth I shall have no more trouble from money matters；
I have taken all the thorns out of my life； and done my housekeeping
work once for all with a vengeance； so as never to be troubled with it
again； except during the daily ten minutes which I shall devote to my
old major…domo Philippe。 I have made a study of life and its sharp
curves； there came a day when death also gave me harsh lessons。 Now I
want to turn all this to account。 My one occupation will be to please
/him/ and love /him/； to brighten with variety what to common mortals
is monotonously dull。
Gaston is still in complete ignorance。 At my request he has； like
myself； taken up his quarters at Ville d'Avray； to…morrow we start for
the chalet。 Our life there will cost but little； but if I told you the
sum I am setting aside for my toilet； you would exclaim at my madness；
and with reason。 I intend to take as much trouble to make myself
beautiful for him every day as other women do for society。 My dress in
the country； year in； year out； will cost twenty…four thousand francs；
and the larger portion of this will not go in day costumes。 As for
him； he can wear a blouse if he pleases！ Don't suppose that I am going
to turn our life into an amorous duel and wear myself out in devices
for feeding passion； all that I want is to have a conscience free from
reproach。 Thirteen years still lie before me as a pretty woman； and I
am determined to be loved on the last day of the thirteenth even more
fondly than on the morrow of our mysterious nuptials。 This time no
cutting words shall mar my lowly； grateful content。 I will take the
part of servant； since that of mistress throve so ill with me before。
Ah！ Renee； if Gaston has sounded； as I have； the heights and depths of
love； my happiness is assured！ Nature at the chalet wears her fairest
face。 The woods are charming； each step opens up to you some fresh
vista of cool greenery； which delights the soul by the sweet thoughts
it wakens。 They breathe of love。 If only this be not the gorgeous
theatre dressed by my hand for my own martyrdom！
In two days from now I shall be Mme。 Gaston。 My God！ is it fitting a
Christian so to love mortal man？
〃Well； at least you have the law with you；〃 was the comment of my man
of business； who is to be one of my witnesses； and who exclaimed； on
discovering why my property was to be realized； 〃I am losing a
client！〃
And you； my sweetheart （whom I dare no longer call my loved one）； may
you not cry； 〃I am losing a sister？〃
My sweet； address when you write in future to Mme。 Gaston； Poste
Restante； Versailles。 We shall send there every day for letters。 I
don't want to be known to the country people； and we shall get our
provisions from Paris。 In this way I hope we may guard the secret of
our lives。 Nobody has been seen in the place during the years spent in
preparing our retreat； and the purchase was made in the troubled
period which followed the revolution of July。 The only person who has
shown himself here is the architect； he alone is known； and he will
not return。
Farewell。 As I write this word； I know not whether my heart is fuller
of grief or joy。 That proves； does it not； that the pain of losing you
equals my love for Gaston？
XLIX
MARIE GASTON TO DANIEL D'ARTHEZ
October 1833。
My Dear Daniel；I need two witnesses for my marriage。 I beg of you to
come to…morrow evening for this purpose； bringing with you our worthy
and honored friend； Joseph Bridau。 She who is to be my wife； with an
instinctive divination of my dearest wishes； has declared her
intention of living far from the world in complete retirement。 You；
who have done so much to lighten my penury； have been left in
ignorance of my love； but you will understand that absolute secrecy
was essential。
This will explain to you why it is that； for the last year； we have
seen so little of each other。 On the morrow of my wedding we shall be
parted for a long time； but； Daniel； you are of stuff to understand
me。 Friendship can subsist in the absence of the friend。 There may be
times when I shall want you badly； but I shall not see you； at least
not in my own house。 Here again /she/ has forestalled our wishes。 She
has sacrificed to me her intimacy with a friend of her childhood； who
has been a sister to her。 For her sake； then； I also must relinquish
my comrade！
From this fact alone you will divine that ours is no mere passing
fancy； but love； absolute； perfect； godlike； love based upon the
fullest knowledge that can bind two hearts in sympathy。 To me it is a
perpetual spring of purest delight。
Yet nature allows of no happiness without alloy； and deep down； in the
innermost recess of my heart； I am conscious of a lurking thought； not
shared with her； the pang of which is for me alone。 You have too often
come to the help of my inveterate poverty to be ignorant how desperate
matters were with me。 Where should I have found courage to keep up the
struggle of life； after seeing my hopes so often blighted； but for
your cheering words； your tactful aid； and the knowledge of what you
had come through？ Briefly； then； my friend； she freed me from that
crushing load of debt； which was no secret to you。 She is wealthy； I
am penniless。 Many a time have I exclaimed； in one of my fits of
idleness； 〃Oh for some great heiress to cast her eye on me！〃 And now；
in presence of this reality； the boy's careless jest； the unscrupulous
cynicism of the outcast； have alike vanished； leaving in their place
only a bitter sense of humiliation； which not the most considerate
tenderness on her part； nor my own assurance of her noble nature； can
remove。 Nay； what better proof of my love could there exist； for her
or for myself； than this shame； from which I have not recoiled； even
when powerless to overcome it？ The fact remains that there is a point
where； far from protecting； I am the protected。
This is my pain which I confide to you。
Except in this one particular； dear Daniel； my fondest dreams are more
than realized。 Fairest and noblest among women； such a bride might
indeed raise a man to giddy heights of bliss。 Her gentle ways are
seasoned with wit； her love comes with an ever…fresh grace and charm；
her mind is well informed and quick to understand； in person； she is
fair and lovely； with a rounded slimness； as though Raphael and Rubens
had conspired to create a woman！ I do not know whether I could have
worshiped with such fervor at the shrine of a dark beauty； a brunette
always strikes me as an unfinished boy。 She is a widow； childless； and
twenty…seven years of age。 Though brimful of life and energy； she has
her moods also of dreamy melancholy。 These rare gifts go with a proud
aristocratic bearing； she has a