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has； no doubt； been there for some time。 Ah！ he won't give me any more
lessons； he wants to receive themwell； he shall have one。 If only he
knew what I said to myself about his superficial ugliness！ Others can
philosophize besides you； Renee！ It was horrid； I argued； to fall in
love with a handsome man。 Is it not practically avowing that the
senses count for three parts out of four in a passion which ought to
be super…sensual？
Having got over my first alarm； I craned my neck behind the window in
order to see him againand well was I rewarded！ By means of a hollow
cane he blew me in through the window a letter； cunningly rolled round
a leaden pellet。
Good Heavens！ will he suppose I left the window open on purpose？
But what was to be done？ To shut it suddenly would be to make oneself
an accomplice。
I did better。 I returned to my window as though I had seen nothing and
heard nothing of the letter； then I said aloud：
〃Come and look at the stars； Griffith。〃
Griffith was sleeping as only old maids can。 But the Moor； hearing me；
slid down； and vanished with ghostly rapidity。
He must have been dying of fright； and so was I； for I did not hear
him go away； apparently he remained at the foot of the elm。 After a
good quarter of an hour； during which I lost myself in contemplation
of the heavens； and battled with the waves of curiosity； I closed my
widow and sat down on the bed to unfold the delicate bit of paper；
with the tender touch of a worker amongst the ancient manuscripts at
Naples。 It felt redhot to my fingers。 〃What a horrible power this man
has over me！〃 I said to myself。
All at once I held out the paper to the candleI would burn it
without reading a word。 Then a thought stayed me； 〃What can he have to
say that he writes so secretly？〃 Well； dear； I /did/ burn it；
reflecting that； though any other girl in the world would have
devoured the letter； it was not fitting that IArmande…Louise…Marie
de Chaulieushould read it。
The next day； at the Italian opera； he was at his post。 But I feel
sure that； ex…prime minister of a constitutional government though he
is； he could not discover the slightest agitation of mind in any
movement of mine。 I might have seen nothing and received nothing the
evening before。 This was most satisfactory to me； but he looked very
sad。 Poor man！ in Spain it is so natural for love to come in at the
window！
During the interval； it seems； he came and walked in the passages。
This I learned from the chief secretary of the Spanish embassy； who
also told the story of a noble action of his。
As Duc de Soria he was to marry one of the richest heiresses in Spain；
the young princess Marie Heredia； whose wealth would have mitigated
the bitterness of exile。 But it seems that Marie； disappointing the
wishes of the fathers； who had betrothed them in their earliest
childhood； loved the younger son of the house of Soria； to whom my
Felipe； gave her up。 Allowing himself to be despoiled by the King of
Spain。
〃He would perform this piece of heroism quite simply；〃 I said to the
young man。
〃You know him then？〃 was his ingenuous reply。
My mother smiled。
〃What will become of him； for he is condemned to death？〃 I asked。
〃Though dead to Spain； he can live in Sardinia。〃
〃Ah！ then Spain is the country of tombs as well as castles？〃 I said；
trying to carry it off as a joke。
〃There is everything in Spain； even Spaniards of the old school；〃 my
mother replied。
〃The Baron de Macumer obtained a passport； not without difficulty；
from the King of Sardinia；〃 the young diplomatist went on。 〃He has now
become a Sardinian subject； and he possesses a magnificent estate in
the island with full feudal rights。 He has a palace at Sassari。 If
Ferdinand VII。 were to die； Macumer would probably go in for
diplomacy； and the Court of Turin would make him ambassador。 Though
young； he is〃
〃Ah！ he is young？〃
〃Certainly； mademoiselle 。 。 。 though young； he is one of the most
distinguished men in Spain。〃
I scanned the house meanwhile through my opera…glass； and seemed to
lend an inattentive ear to the secretary； but； between ourselves； I
was wretched at having burnt his letter。 In what terms would a man
like that express his love？ For he does love me。 To be loved； adored
in secret； to know that in this house； where all the great men of
Paris were collected； there was one entirely devoted to me； unknown to
everybody！ Ah！ Renee； now I understand the life of Paris； its balls；
and its gaieties。 It all flashed on me in the true light。 When we
love； we must have society； were it only to sacrifice it to our love。
I felt a different creatureand such a happy one！ My vanity； pride；
self…love；all were flattered。 Heaven knows what glances I cast upon
the audience！
〃Little rogue！〃 the Duchess whispered in my ear with a smile。
Yes； Renee； my wily mother had deciphered the hidden joy in my
bearing； and I could only haul down my flag before such feminine
strategy。 Those two words taught me more of worldly wisdom than I have
been able to pick up in a yearfor we are in March now。 Alas！ no more
Italian opera in another month。 How will life be possible without that
heavenly music； when one's heart is full of love？
When I got home； my dear； with determination worthy of a Chaulieu； I
opened my window to watch a shower of rain。 Oh！ if men knew the magic
spell that a heroic action throws over us； they would indeed rise to
greatness！ a poltroon would turn hero！ What I had learned about my
Spaniard drove me into a very fever。 I felt certain that he was there；
ready to aim another letter at me。
I was right； and this time I burnt nothing。 Here； then； is the first
love…letter I have received； madame logician： each to her kind：
〃Louise； it is not for your peerless beauty I love you； nor for
your gifted mind； your noble feeling； the wondrous charm of all
you say and do； nor yet for your pride； your queenly scorn of
baser mortalsa pride blent in you with charity； for what angel
could be more tender？Louise； I love you because； for the sake of
a poor exile； you have unbent this lofty majesty； because by a
gesture； a glance； you have brought consolation to a man so far
beneath you that the utmost he could hope for was your pity； the
pity of a generous heart。 You are the one woman whose eyes have
shone with a tenderer light when bent on me。
〃And because you let fall this glancea mere grain of dust； yet a
grace surpassing any bestowed on me when I stood at the summit of
a subject's ambitionI long to tell you； Louise； how dear you are
to me； and that my love is for yourself alone； without a thought
beyond； a love that far more than fulfils the conditions laid down
by you for an ideal passion。
〃Know； then； idol of my highest heaven； that there is in the world
an offshoot of the Saracen race； whose life is in your hands； who
will receive your orders as a slave； and deem it an honor to
execute them。 I have given myself to you absolutely and for the
mere joy of giving； for a single glance of your eye； for a touch
of the hand which one day you offered to your Spanish master。 I am
but your serv