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hard to accept。 〃I should rather enjoy paying them back；〃
something in her maliciously murmured。
She did not mean to marry Streffordshe had not even got as far
as contemplating the possibility of a divorce but it was
undeniable that this sudden prospect of wealth and freedom was
like fresh air in her lungs。 She laughed again； but now without
bitterness。
〃Very good； then； we'll lunch together。 But it's Streff I want
to lunch with to…day。〃
〃Ah； well；〃 her companion agreed； 〃I rather think that for a
tete…a…tete he's better company。〃
During their repast in a little restaurant over the Seine； where
she insisted on the cheapest dishes because she was lunching
with 〃Streff；〃 he became again his old whimsical companionable
self。 Once or twice she tried to turn the talk to his altered
future； and the obligations and interests that lay before him；
but he shrugged away from the subject； questioning her instead
about the motley company at Violet Melrose's； and fitting a
droll or malicious anecdote to each of the people she named。
It was not till they had finished their coffee； and she was
glancing at her watch with a vague notion of taking the next
train； that he asked abruptly： 〃But what are you going to do？
You can't stay forever at Violet's。〃
〃Oh； no！〃 she cried with a shiver。
〃Well； thenyou've got some plan； I suppose？〃
〃Have I？〃 she wondered； jerked back into grim reality from the
soothing interlude of their hour together。
〃You can't drift indefinitely； can you？ Unless you mean to go
back to the old sort of life once for all。〃
She reddened and her eyes filled。 〃I can't do that； StreffI
know I can't！〃
〃Then what？〃
She hesitated； and brought out with lowered head： 〃Nick said he
would write againin a few days。 I must wait〃
〃Oh； naturally。 Don't do anything in a hurry。〃 Strefford also
glanced at his watch。 〃Garcon； l'addition！ I'm taking the
train back to…night； and I've a lot of things left to do。 But
look here； my dearwhen you come to a decision one way or the
other let me know； will you？ Oh； I don't mean in the matter
I've most at heart； we'll consider that closed for the present。
But at least I can be of use in other wayshang it； you know； I
can even lend you money。 There's a new sensation for our jaded
palates！〃
〃Oh； Streff 。。。 Streff！〃 she could only falter； and he pressed
on gaily： 〃Try it； now do try itI assure you there'll be no
interest to pay； and no conditions attached。 And promise to let
me know when you've decided anything。 〃
She looked into his humorously puckered eyes； answering。 Their
friendly smile with hers。
〃I promise！〃 she said。
XV
THAT hour with Strefford had altered her whole perspective。
Instead of possible dependence； an enforced return to the old
life of connivances and concessions； she saw before her
whenever she chose to take themfreedom； power and dignity。
Dignity！ It was odd what weight that word had come to have for
her。 She had dimly felt its significance； felt the need of its
presence in her inmost soul； even in the young thoughtless days
when she had seemed to sacrifice so little to the austere
divinities。 And since she had been Nick Lansing's wife she had
consciously acknowledged it； had suffered and agonized when she
fell beneath its standard。 Yes： to marry Strefford would give
her that sense of self…respect which； in such a world as theirs；
only wealth and position could ensure。 If she had not the
mental or moral training to attain independence in any other
way； was she to blame for seeking it on such terms？
Of course there was always the chance that Nick would come back；
would find life without her as intolerable as she was finding it
without him。 If that happenedah； if that happened！ Then she
would cease to strain her eyes into the future； would seize upon
the present moment and plunge into it to the very bottom of
oblivion。 Nothing on earth would matter thenmoney or freedom
or pride； or her precious moral dignity； if only she were in
Nick's arms again！
But there was Nick's icy letter； there was Coral Hicks's
insolent post…card； to show how little chance there was of such
a solution。 Susy understood that； even before the discovery of
her transaction with Ellie Vanderlyn； Nick had secretly wearied；
if not of his wife； at least of the life that their marriage
compelled him to lead。 His passion was not strong enough…had
never been strong enoughto outweigh his prejudices； scruples；
principles； or whatever one chose to call them。 Susy's dignity
might go up like tinder in the blaze of her love； but his was
made of a less combustible substance。 She had felt； in their
last talk together； that she had forever destroyed the inner
harmony between them。
Wellthere it was； and the fault was doubtless neither hers nor
his； but that of the world they had grown up in； of their own
moral contempt for it and physical dependence on it； of his
half…talents and her half…principles； of the something in them
both that was not stout enough to resist nor yet pliant enough
to yield。 She stared at the fact on the journey back to
Versailles； and all that sleepless night in her room； and the
next morning； when the housemaid came in with her breakfast
tray； she felt the factitious energy that comes from having
decided； however half…heartedly； on a definite course。
She had said to herself： 〃If there's no letter from Nick this
time next week I'll write to Streff〃 and the week had passed；
and there was no letter。
It was now three weeks since he had left her； and she had had no
word but his note from Genoa。 She had concluded that；
foreseeing the probability of her leaving Venice； he would write
to her in care of their Paris bank。 But though she had
immediately notified the bank of her change of address no
communication from Nick had reached her； and she smiled with a
touch of bitterness at the difficulty he was doubtless finding
in the composition of the promised letter。 Her own scrap…
basket； for the first days； had been heaped with the fragments
of the letters she had begun； and she told herself that； since
they both found it so hard to write； it was probably because
they had nothing left to say to each other。
Meanwhile the days at Mrs。 Melrose's drifted by as they had been
wont to drift when； under the roofs of the rich； Susy Branch had
marked time between one episode and the next of her precarious
existence。 Her experience of such sojourns was varied enough to
make her acutely conscious of their effect on her temporary
hosts； and in the present case she knew that Violet was hardly
aware of her presence。 But if no more than tolerated she was at
least not felt to be an inconvenience； when your hostess forgot
about you it proved that at least you were not in her way。
Violet； as usual； was perpetually on the wing； for her profound
indo