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recognition） has placed these people in a singularly false
position。 An American girl who has married a Duke is a good deal
astonished to find that she is legally only plain 〃Madame So and
So；〃 that when her husband does his military service there is no
trace of the high…sounding title to be found in his official
papers。 Some years ago； a colonel was rebuked because he allowed
the Duc d'Alencon to be addressed as 〃Monseigneur〃 by the other
officers of his regiment。 This ought to make ambitious papas
reflect； when they treat themselves to titled sons…in…law。 They
should at least try and get an article recognized by the law。
Most of what is written here is perfectly well known to resident
Americans in Paris； and has been the cause of gradually splitting
that once harmonious settlement into two perfectly distinct camps；
between which no love is lost。 The members of one； clinging to
their countrymen's creed of having the best or nothing； have been
contented to live in France and know but few French people；
entertaining among themselves and marrying their daughters to
Americans。 The members of the other； who have 〃gone in〃 for French
society； take what they can get； and； on the whole； lead very jolly
lives。 It often happens （perhaps it is only a coincidence） that
ladies who have not been very successful at home are partial to
this circle； where they easily find guests for their entertainments
and the recognition their souls long for。
What the future of the 〃Great Faubourg〃 will be； it is hard to say。
All hope of a possible RESTAURATION appears to be lost。 Will the
proud necks that refused to bend to the Orleans dynasty or the two
〃empires〃 bow themselves to the republican yoke？ It would seem as
if it must terminate in this way； for everything in this world must
finish。 But the end is not yet； one cannot help feeling sympathy
for people who are trying to live up to their traditions and be
true to such immaterial idols as 〃honor〃 and 〃family〃 in this
discouragingly material age； when everything goes down before the
Golden Calf。 Nor does one wonder that men who can trace their
ancestors back to the Crusades should hesitate to ally themselves
with the last rich PARVENU who has raised himself from the gutter；
or resent the ardor with which the latest importation of American
ambition tries to chum with them and push its way into their life。
CHAPTER 31 … Men's Manners
NOTHING makes one feel so old as to wake up suddenly； as it were；
and realize that the conditions of life have changed； and that the
standards you knew and accepted in your youth have been raised or
lowered。 The young men you meet have somehow become uncomfortably
polite； offering you armchairs in the club； and listening with a
shade of deference to your stories。 They are of another
generation； their ways are not your ways； nor their ambitions those
you had in younger days。 One is tempted to look a little closer；
to analyze what the change is； in what this subtle difference
consists； which you feel between your past and their present。 You
are surprised and a little angry to discover that； among other
things； young men have better manners than were general among the
youths of fifteen years ago。
Anyone over forty can remember three epochs in men's manners。 When
I was a very young man； there were still going about in society a
number of gentlemen belonging to what was reverently called the
〃old school；〃 who had evidently taken Sir Charles Grandison as
their model； read Lord Chesterfield's letters to his son with
attention； and been brought up to commence letters to their
fathers； 〃Honored Parent；〃 signing themselves 〃Your humble servant
and respectful son。〃 There are a few such old gentlemen still to
be found in the more conservative clubs； where certain windows are
tacitly abandoned to these elegant…mannered fossils。 They are
quite harmless unless you happen to find them in a reminiscent
mood； when they are apt to be a little tiresome； it takes their
rusty mental machinery so long to get working！ Washington
possesses a particularly fine collection among the retired army and
navy officers and ex…officials。 It is a fact well known that no
one drawing a pension ever dies。
About 1875； a new generation with new manners began to make its
appearance。 A number of its members had been educated at English
universities； and came home burning to upset old ways and teach
their elders how to live。 They broke away from the old clubs and
started smaller and more exclusive circles among themselves；
principally in the country。 This was a period of bad manners。
True to their English model； they considered it 〃good form〃 to be
uncivil and to make no effort towards the general entertainment
when in society。 Not to speak more than a word or two during a
dinner party to either of one's neighbors was the supreme CHIC。 As
a revolt from the twice…told tales of their elders they held it to
be 〃bad form〃 to tell a story； no matter how fresh and amusing it
might be。 An unfortunate outsider who ventured to tell one in
their club was crushed by having his tale received in dead silence。
When it was finished one of the party would 〃ring the bell；〃 and
the circle order drinks at the expense of the man who had dared to
amuse them。 How the professional story…teller must have shuddered
… he whose story never was ripe until it had been told a couple of
hundred times； and who would produce a certain tale at a certain
course as surely as clock…work。
That the story…telling type was a bore； I grant。 To be grabbed on
entering your club and obliged to listen to Smith's last； or to
have the conversation after dinner monopolized by Jones and his
eternal 〃Speaking of coffee； I remember once；〃 etc。 added an
additional hardship to existence。 But the opposite pose； which
became the fashion among the reformers； was hardly less wearisome。
To sit among a group of perfectly mute men； with an occasional word
dropping into the silence like a stone in a well； was surely little
better。
A girl told me she had once sat through an entire cotillion with a
youth whose only remark during the evening had been （after absorbed
contemplation of the articles in question）； 〃How do you like my
socks？〃
On another occasion my neighbor at table said to me：
〃I think the man on my right has gone to sleep。 He is sitting with
his eyes closed！〃 She was mistaken。 He was practising his newly
acquired 〃repose of manner；〃 and living up to the standard of his
set。
The model young man of that period had another offensive habit； his
pose of never seeing you； which got on the nerves of his elders to
a considerable extent。 If he came into a drawing…room where you
were sitting with a lady； he would shake hands with her and begin a
conversation； ignoring