尤利西斯-第241章

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ere　so　plump　and　tempting　in　my　short　petticoat　he　couldnt　resist　they　excite　myself　sometimes　its　well　for　men　all　the　amount　of　pleasure　they　get　off　a　womans　body　were　so　round　and　white　for　them　always　I　wished　I　was　one　myself　for　a　change　just　to　try　with　that　thing　they　have　swelling　upon　you　so　hard　and　at　the　same　time　so　soft　when　you　touch　it　my　uncle　John　has　a　thing　long　I　heard　those　cornerboys　saying　passing　the　corner　of　Marrowbone　lane　my　aunt　Mary　has　a　thing　hairy　because　it　was　dark　and　they　knew　a　girl　was　passing　it　didnt　make　me　blush　why　should　it　either　its　only　nature　and　he　puts　his　thing　long　into　my　aunt　Marys　hairy　etcetera　and　turns　out　to　be　you　put　the　handle　in　a　sweepingbrush　men　again　all　over　they　can　pick　and　choose　what　they　please　a　married　woman　or　a　fast　widow　or　a　girl　for　their　different　tastes　like　those　houses　round　behind　Irish　street　no　but　were　to　be　always　chained　up　theyre　not　going　to　be　chaining　me　up　no　damn　fear　once　I　start　I　tell　you　for　stupid　husbands　jealousy　why　cant　we　all　remain　friends　over　it　instead　of　quarrelling　her　husband　found　it　out　what　they　did　together　well　naturally　and　if　he　did　can　he　undo　it　hes　coronado　anyway　whatever　he　does　and　then　he　going　to　the　other　mad　extreme　about　the　wife　in　Fair　Tyrants　of　course　the　man　never　even　casts　a　2nd　thought　on　the　husband　or　wife　either　its　the　woman　he　wants　and　he　gets　her　what　else　were　we　given　all　those　desires　for　Id　like　to　know　I　cant　help　it　if　Im　young　still　can　I　its　a　wonder　Im　not　an　old　shrivelled　hag　before　my　time　living　with　him　so　cold　never　embracing　me　except　sometimes　when　hes　asleep　the　wrong　end　of　me　not　knowing　I　suppose　who　he　has　any　man　thatd　kiss　a　womans　bottom　Id　throw　my　hat　at　him　after　that　hed　kiss　anything　unnatural　where　we　havent　1　atom　of　any　kind　of　expression　in　us　all　of　us　the　same　2　lumps　of　lard　before　ever　I　do　that　to　a　man　pfooh　the　dirty　brutes　the　mere　thought　is　enough　I　kiss　the　feet　of　you　senorita　theres　some　sense　in　that　didnt　he　kiss　our　halldoor　yes　he　did　what　a　madman　nobody　understands　his　cracked　ideas　but　me　still　of　course　a　woman　wants　to　be　embraced　20　times　a　day　almost　to　make　her　look　young　no　matter　by　who　so　long　as　to　be　in　love　or　loved　by　somebody　if　the　fellow　you　want　isnt　there　sometimes　by　the　Lord　God　I　was　thinking　would　I　go　around　by　the　quays　there　some　dark　evening　where　nobodyd　know　me　and　pick　up　a　sailor　off　the　sea　thatd　be　hot　on　for　it　and　not　care　a　pin　whose　I　was　only　to　do　it　off　up　in　a　gate　somewhere　or　one　of　those　wildlooking　gipsies　in　Rathfarnham　had　their　camp　pitched　near　the　Bloomfield　laundry　to　try　and　steal　our　things　if　they　could　I　only　sent　mine　there　a　few　times　for　the　name　model　laundry　sending　me　back　over　and　over　some　old　ones　old　stockings　that　blackguardlooking　fellow　with　the　fine　eyes　peeling　a　switch　attack　me　in　the　dark　and　ride　me　up　against　the　wall　without　a　word　or　a　murderer　anybody　what　they　do　themselves　the　fine　gentlemen　in　their　silk　hats　that　K　C　lives　up　somewhere　this　way　ing　out　of　Hardwicke　lane　the　night　he　gave　us　the　fish　supper　on　account　of　winning　over　the　boxing　match　of　course　it　was　for　me　he　gave　it　I　knew　him　by　his　gaiters　and　the　walk　and　when　I　turned　round　a　minute　after　just　to　see　there　was　a　woman　after　ing　out　of　it　too　some　filthy　prostitute　then　he　goes　home　to　his　wife　after　that　only　I　suppose　the　half　of　those　sailors　are　rotten　again　with　disease　O　move　over　your　big　carcass　out　of　that　for　the　love　of　Mike　listen　to　him　the　winds　that　waft　my　sighs　to　thee　so　well　he　may　sleep　and　sigh　the　great　Suggester　Don　Poldo　de　la　Flora　if　he　knew　how　he　came　out　on　the　cards　this　morning　hed　have　something　to　sigh　for　a　dark　man　in　some　perplexity　between　2　7s　too　in　prison　for　Lord　knows　what　he　does　that　I　dont　know　and　Im　to　be　slooching　around　down　in　the　kitchen　to　get　his　lordship　his　breakfast　while　hes　rolled　up　like　a　mummy　will　I　indeed　did　you　ever　see　me　running　Id　just　like　to　see　myself　at　it　show　them　attention　and　they　treat　you　like　dirt　I　dont　care　what　anybody　says　itd　be　much　better　for　the　world　to　be　governed　by　the　women　in　it　you　wouldnt　see　women　going　and　killing　one　another　and　slaughtering　when　do　you　ever　see　women　rolling　around　drunk　like　they　do　or　gambling　every　penny　they　have　and　losing　it　on　horses　yes　because　a　woman　whatever　she　does　she　knows　where　to　stop　sure　they　wouldn't　be　in　the　world　at　all　only　for　us　they　dont　know　what　it　is　to　be　a　woman　and　a　mother　how　could　they　where　would　they　all　of　them　be　if　they　hadnt　all　a　mother　to　look　after　them　what　I　never　had　thats　why　I　suppose　hes　running　wild　now　out　at　night　away　from　his　books　and　studies　and　not　living　at　home　on　account　of　the　usual　rowdy　house　I　suppose　well　its　a　poor　case　that　those　that　have　a　fine　son　like　that　theyre　not　satisfied　and　I　none　was　he　not　able　to　make　one　it　wasnt　my　fault　we　came　together　when　I　was　watching　the　two　dogs　up　in　her　behind　in　the　middle　of　the　naked　street　that　disheartened　me　altogether　I　suppose　I　oughtnt　to　have　buried　him　in　that　little　woolly　jacket　I　knitted　crying　as　was　but　give　it　to　some　poor　child　but　I　knew　well　Id　never　have　another　our　1st　death　too　it　was　we　were　never　the　same　since　O　Im　not　going　to　think　myself　into　the　glooms　about　that　any　more　I　wonder　why　he　wouldnt　stay　the　night　I　felt　all　the　time　it　was　somebody　strange　he　brought　in　instead　of　roving　around　the　city　meeting　God　knows　who　nightwalkers　and　pickpockets　his　poor　mother　wouldnt　like　that　if　she　was　alive　ruining　himself　for　life　perhaps　still　its　a　lovely　hour　so　silent　I　used　to　love　ing　home　after　dances　the　air　of　the　night　they　have　friends　they　can　talk　to　weve　none　either　he　wants　what　he　wont　get　or　its　some　woman　ready　to　stick　her　knife　in　you　I　hate　that　in　women　no　wonder　they　treat　us　the　way　they　do　we　are　a　dreadful　lot　of　bitches　I　suppose　its　all　the　troubles　we　have　makes　us　so　snappy　Im　not　like　that　he　could　easy　have　slept　in　there　on　the　sofa　in　the　other　room　suppose　he　was　as　shy　as　a　boy　he　being　so　young　hardly　20　of　me　in　the　next　room　hed　have　heard　me　on　the　chamber　arrah　what　harm　Dedalus　I　wonder　its　like　those　names　in　Gibraltar　Delapaz　Delagracia　they　had　the　devils　queer　names　there　father　Vial　plana　of　Santa　Maria　that　gave　me　the　rosary　Rosales　y　OReilly　in　the　Calle　las　Siete　Revueltas　and　Pisimbo　and　Mrs　Opisso　in　Governor　street　O　what　a　name　Id　go　and　drown　myself　in　the　first　river　if　I　had　a　name　like　her　O　my　and　all　the　bits　of　streets　Paradise　ramp　and　Bedlam　ramp　and　Rodgers　ramp　and　Crutchetts　ramp　and　the　devils　gap　steps　well　small　blame　to　me　if　I　am　a　harumscarum　I　know　I　am　a　bit　I　declare　to　God　I　dont　feel　a　day　older　than　then　I　wonder　could　I　get　my　tongue　round　any　of　the　Spanish　o　esta　usted　muy　bien　gracias　y　usted　see　I　haven't　forgotten　it　all　I　thought　I　had　only　for　the　grammar　a　noun　is　the　name　of　any　person　place　or　thing　pity　I　never　tried　to　read　that　novel　cantankerous　Mrs　Rubio　lent　me　by　Valera　with　the　questions　in　it　all　upside　down　the　two　ways　I　always　knew　wed　go　away　in　the　end　I　can　tell　him　the　Spanish　and　he　tell　me　the　Italian　then　hell　see　Im　not　so　ign